Nearly 800 years ago, the Persian mystic poet Rumi wrote, You must ask for what you really want. He saw asking as a sacred duty, and I think he was right—not because your wishes will be granted automatically (they wont), but because the mere act of saying aloud This is who I am and what Ive come for seems to awaken a powerful force within. By articulating your wish, youre making an announcement that youre serious about bringing forth the next great thing in your life. The hurdle, however, is that asking for what you really want—whether its a job as a writer or a discount on tires—can be difficult. Especially for women. First of all, you must know what you really want, which can be hard if you were raised to please others. Secondly, you must believe that what you want is worthy—again, a tricky prospect for women long trained in the dark arts of self-deprecation. Thirdly, you must face the possibility of rejection. Thats the worst of it. Women dont like being turned down (we get enough of that in our personal lives), and so, like trial lawyers, we often ask only questions to which we already know the answers. Which means: no risk. Which further means: no reward. The funny thing is that rejection is not so bad, really. This is something I think men have always understood—that a glorious failure can sometimes be more life affirming than a cautious win. This is why men are constantly asking for stuff they might not even deserve or arent totally qualified to handle. I dont say this as an insult to men, either; I wish more women would do the same. Because sometimes you get a yes, and even if you werent prepared for that yes, you rise to the occasion. You arent ready, and then you are. Its irrational, but its magical. -- Elizabeth Gilbert
Posted on: Thu, 21 Aug 2014 22:48:26 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015