New poem I wrote about my continued frustrations of the church and in the fight for justice. This poem gave me some good Holy Spirit fire and renewal and I am thankful for all God does through poems. Let me know what you think and feedback is always good! “People always told me, from past to present, “You talk too much, be quiet, reflect.” Well I have reflected. They tell me I am controversial, they tell me my heart for the broken is silly, they tell me my heart pumping ba dum ba dum ba dum ba dum for the justice of Jesus, is too out there. My Jesus is controversial, my Jesus loves the poor, my Jesus works in the worst places, my Jesus lives in the most dusty heart, my Jesus lives in the immigrant, my Jesus lives in bloody fences, my Jesus lives in the radical. And Daddy…I am so.. tired. of arguing of loving enemies, of denying myself the right of self love. Daddy, my heart is beating fast again, Daddy, did your veins in your heart rip when you saw the woman at the well? Daddy, did you feel your bones creak as you walked towards the yelling at the tax collector.. Daddy, did you know that we are all monsters under children’s beds, waiting to be appeased, as you hung on the cross, waiting to descend into the depths of our dirty messed up broken souls.. Daddy, did you know one day you’d redeem us? Daddy.. Did you feel your heart rip from your chest in joy as you saw the monsters turn back into prince and princesses? Daddy.. save me because my heart is tired, it is worn. It is bitter. It is tired. Daddy, I am not sure how much more my heart can take these ripping veins. Because I choose not to wage war on the marginalized, because I choose not to hate my neighbor, because I choose to love the one who loves differently than I, and because I choose to radicalize normalized christianity. Daddy, did you know I long to be with you? Daddy did you know, I love you this much? Daddy.. did you know I will go to the ends of the earth for the monsters, Daddy, I will hitch a ride on the missiles of hatred to show them the sun of salvation, Daddy, can you make us lovers who never leave their beds because they want to be at each others sides? Daddy, can you make us into listeners, so that we are like the sea, there, waiting, listening, watching, just there. Daddy, make me into a heart, with veins that cannot rip, make my compassion into an understanding friend, saying I love you no matter the circumstance. Daddy, make me into a friend. May I tell the marginalized you are loved. Teach me. I want to know. I want to know how to get rid of this tiredness.. I want to be whole. Teach me how to do justice and be like the sea.. Listening. Waiting. Watching. Seeing.” — This tiredness of justice makes me exhausted, but Jesus teach me how to be new in You by Natalie Bullis
Posted on: Tue, 14 Oct 2014 03:09:12 +0000
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