Not any ideal beginning to 2015...(update...sorry for the - TopicsExpress



          

Not any ideal beginning to 2015...(update...sorry for the length) I am home, alive, thankful, and mostly resting. Wendy and I really the prayers, texts, and calls the past few days. I spent 2 days on no food or liquids, heavily sedated and medicated for pain & nausea from prancreatitus. Of course I get a massive sinus infection from the vomiting, as if detoxing from the other meds isnt enough. I do followups this week to continue to determine the why and how-to-avoid paths. Those of you who have fought the battle know what it does to your soul and your family when you are sick and feel out of control of your own health...I think the worrying is far worse and far more debilitating than anything else. For in that moment, it isnt your life that is challenged, it is your faith. When faith fails, what else is there? A colleague of mine once praised my will for self-reflection...I totally understand that it wasnt just a professional compliment, which I thought at the time it was. It IS how I find Him in turmoil, chaos, and in pain. No matter, I am alive, He lives in me, and His will is being done. I am blessed to be given the opportunity to look into the earthly eyes of those I love, teach, and work with. I am referencing my own feelings about Stuart Scotts passing this morning and taking inventory close to the heart at the same time. I know he gathered his strength for the fight from the lives and love of his children. I weep for them. I didnt know him, I do know what he let us see when he spoke receiving the Arthur Ashe Award at the 2014 ESPYs. He reminded me then, and again this morning how dear, unique and pressing our given time here. Love. I have had several reminders, whispers, I believe, about the importance of love from many of the people I know and associate with in my family, personal and professional life. He must feel I have been missing His point about this emotion...this weakness. The truth is, I have not been a truly loving person at home, at work, with my family, with my church, the list goes on. So, whisper on. I am still, my heart is open and mind mind, awake. Happy New Year, All...lets get this started.
Posted on: Sun, 04 Jan 2015 18:26:39 +0000

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