Några sjuka...: How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but the light bulb has to want to change. Why do Marx and Engels drink herbal tea? Because proper tea is theft. A layman, a scientist and a mathematician are driving through Wales when they spot a black sheep on a hillside. The layman says: “How fascinating. The sheep in Wales are black.” The scientist says: “No. There is one sheep in Wales which is black.” The mathematician sighs and rolls his eyes. “I beg to differ. There is one sheep in Wales, one side of which is black.” What did the proton say to the ever-grumpy electron? “Why do you have to be so negative all the time?” Two atoms are walking down the street. One atom says to the other: “Hey! I think I lost an electron!” The other says: “Are you sure?” “Yes, I’m positive!” Why are quantum physicists terrible in bed? Because when they find the position, they can’t find the momentum, and when they have the momentum, they can’t find the position. Two behaviourists meet in the street. One says to the other: “You’re OK. How am I?” The masochist said to the sadist “hit me” and the sadist said “no”. A woman comes home to find her string theorist husband in bed with another woman. “But honey,” he says, “I can explain everything!” Why didn’t the quantum particle cross the road? He was already on both sides. Why is it so difficult to explain bad puns to kleptomaniacs? Because they always take things so literally.
Posted on: Tue, 23 Jul 2013 08:31:37 +0000
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