OVERCOMING GRIEF AND DISAPPOINTMENT (WINNING YOUR PERSONAL BATTLES) GRIEF IS USUALLY ASSOCIATED with the loss of a loved one through death-probably the most traumatic grief experience any of us encounters in life. But we also experience grief and disappointment due to other losses: losing a spouse through divorce, losing friends through broken relationships, losing companionship when friends or children move away, losing a job, losing ones home or valuable possessions, losing ones first love, losing ones hope of achieving a goal.Any sort of significant loss can throw us into emotional turmoil. Counselor Alfred describes grief as the natural, unavoidable emotional reaction to loss, a process we emotionally work through until we arrive at a place of acceptance, a place that says, I lost and it is okay. Working through this reaction inevitably leaves us vulnerable to the attack of the evil one. We need to keep our spiritual radar especially alert during such periods in our lives.As a process of healing, grieving should follow a natural course over a span of time. Secular counselors say that process can last from one to three years or longer, depending on the severity of the loss. A premature death or a death by suicide or murder is much more traumatic and usually requires even more time to process.Be aware that unresolved, prolonged grief opens the door to spiritual, physical, and emotional problems that can eventually paralyze a persons spiritual progress. To recover, the Christian must go through the same stages of grief as anyone else. However, we might find the process accelerated the more we make use of our spiritual resources. The lows dont have to be as low as for those who grieve with no hope (see 1 Thessalonians 4:13). We defines four tasks of grief; 1. Acceptance rather than denial. Face the reality of what has happened, even though it open a floodgate of pain.2. Allow yourself to feel the pain rather than ignoring or repressing it. Stifled emotional pain shows up in varied ways-such as physical ailments, addictive behavior, or irrational anger-and greatly hinders the healing process. Talk about the loss; allow expression of your emotions.3. Adjust to an environment where that person (or place, job, etc.) is missing. Reorganize your life accordingly. Avoid indulging in self-pity or isolating yourself either physically or emotionally from other believers.4. Withdraw the emotional energy invested in that person, place or job, and reinvest it in someone or something else. Begin to live life for the present and the future, not in the past. Christians can suffer severe frustration in their walk with the Lord because they have never properly grieved past losses. Abuse victims, in particular, need to mourn their loss of the innocence of childhood. This time of grieving need not be lengthy, but the loss and sense of betrayal should be acknowledged so that healing can occur.If you recognize yourself in this scenario, be aware that Satan wants to keep you in a state of spiritual limbo. You can overcome the energy by asking the Holy Spirit to reveal to you any such unresolved grief, lead you on to healing, and then empower you to minister to others with the same needs. If we embrace our loss and work through the grief with Jesus, we will come to acceptance and resolution... Each loss we suffer is an opportunity to invite Jesus deeper into our lives by making him our security instead of what we lost.When I finally cried my tears of loss and profoundly shared with Jesus my anger, fear, and guilt, I felt his acceptance. At first it felt strange to mourn something that had happened more than twenty years ago. But it worked. I felt the self-judgment, fear, and shame dissipate. Our Lord Jesus knew what it was like to be sorrowful and troubled. When his friend Lazarus died, Jesus wept. He wept over the city of Jerusalem. On a dark night in Gethsemane before his arrest and crucifixion, he asked three close friends to keep watch with him because his soul was ...overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death(Matthew 26:38). Because Jesus knew sorrow in his own personal life, he identifies with us in our grief. And when we allow him to, he can help us walk through it in victory. Scripture also offers many words of comfort and healing for the believers who is working through grief and disappointment. SCRIPTURES; I am worn out from groaning;all night long I flood my bed with weepingand drench my couch with tears....The Lord has heard my cry for mercy;the Lord accepts my prayer. (Psalm 6:6, 9) Have no fear of sudden disasteror of the ruin that overtakes the wicked,for the Lord will be your confidenceand will keep your foot from being snared. (Proverbs 3:25-26) God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. (Psalm 46:1) From the ends of the earth I call to you,I call as my heart grows faint;lead me to the rock that is higher than I. (Psalm 61:2) Find rest, O my soul, In God alone;my hope comes from him.He alone is my rock and my salvation;he is my fortress, I will not be shaken...Trust in him at all times, O people;pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge.(Psalm 62:5-6, 8) The lowly he sets on high,and those who mourn are lifted to safely. (Job 5:11) ... a time to weep and a time to laugh,a time to mourn and a time to dance... (Ecclesiastes 3:4) But you, O God, do see trouble and grief;you consider it to take it in hand.The victim commits himself to you;you are the helper of the fatherless. (Psalm 10:14) Even though I walkthrough the valley of the shadow of death,I will fear no evil,for you are with me;your rod and your staff,they comfort me. (Psalm 23:4) Be merciful to me, O Lord, for I am in distress;my eyes grow weak with sorrow,my soul and my body with grief. (Psalm 31:9) For he does not willingly bring afflictionor grief to the children of men. (Lamentations 3:33) My comfort in my suffering is this:Your promise preserves my life....May your unfailing live be my comport,according to your promise to your servant. (Psalm 119:50, 76) With joy you will draw waterfrom the wells of salvation. (Isaiah 12:3) I will go before youand will level the mountains;I will break down gates of bronzeand cut through bars of iron.I will give you the treasures of darkness,riches stored in secret places,so that you may know that I am the Lord,the God of Israel, who summons you by name.(Isaiah 45:2-3) The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me,...[to] provide for those who grieve in Zion-to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes,the oil of gladnessinstead of mourning,and a garment of praiseinstead of a spirit of despair.They will be called oaks of righteousness,a planting of the Lordfor the display of his splendor. (Isaiah 61:1, 3) Then maidens will dance and be glad,young men and old as wellI will turn their mourning into gladness;I will give them comfort and joy instead of sorrow. (Jeremiah 31:13) Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows.... And our hope for you is firm, because we know that just as you share in our sufferings, so also you share in our comfort. (2 Corinthians 1:3-5, 7) But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness... (Galatians 5:22) ... one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 3:13-14) Brothers, we do not want you to be ignorant about those who fall asleep, or to grieve like the rest of men, who have no hope. We believe that Jesus died and rose again and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him... For the Lord himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. (1 Thessalonians 4:13-14, 16) Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. (Hebrews 12:2) Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds.... (James 1:2) In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials...But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light...But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed. (1 Peter 1:6; 2:9; 4:13) For the Lamb at the center of the throne will be their shepherd; he will lead them to springs of living water.And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes....... There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away. (Revelation 7:17; 21:4) PRAYER FOR THE GRIEVING;Father, I acknowledge to you my pain, my anger, my fear, my sadness, and sense of feeling overwhelmed. Lord, I take refuge in you because you are the Rock that is higher than I. I place myself in your hands to be led through this process of grief and sorrow, knowing that you will take me at my own pace.Father, I trust in you for total restoration of body, soul, and spirit. Thank you for being my confidence, firm and strong, and for keeping my foot from being caught in hidden pitfalls of the enemy. I choose to put my trust in you, even though I don’t always understand. Hover over me with the comfort of your Holy Spirit, in Jesus Christ’ Mighty name. Amen.. PRAYER FOR THE DISAPPOINTED;Father, this disappointment is almost more than I can bear. You said that the Holy Spirit would comfort us. You said others would comfort us. I need the assurance of that comfort. Thank you that you know the road ahead of me and ordain my steps. Help me to trust you in these uncertain times and to walk in the confidence of your love for me. Lord, help me to focus on you, instead of on my own hurt.I refuse to allow the enemy to steal my joy. Lord, my joy is in you, and does not depend upon favorable circumstances. Thank you that you alone are my source of life. Thank you for dying for every hurt I will ever need to endure. I rejoice in you today. In Jesus’ Mighty name. Amen..
Posted on: Thu, 20 Mar 2014 10:20:58 +0000
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