Oh man...breaks my heart, Ive been watching Zak watch his sister lately and wonder if this is what hes thinking... I sad because my legs no work so good. I no run fast like Parker. My lets no work. :-( I have cried on and off all morning – thinking about that conversation this morning and the conversations that are inevitably going to follow it. And I still have absolutely no idea what to tell him. There are things that a hug and a kiss can’t fix. That I don’t know is the only response to, and yet still grossly insufficient. There are I’m sorrys that I want to utter quietly to him, that I want to scream and cry in frustration for him – wanting him to know that I’m sorry this happened to him, that he didn’t deserve it, that I wish it had happened to me instead – all the while making clear to him all the reasons I’m not sorry – not for a single second that he is mine, that I wouldn’t want anyone but him to call my son, that there have been four long years now that he has made me proud each day without ever knowing why. But he knows now. I thought we had more time.
Posted on: Fri, 06 Jun 2014 02:58:43 +0000
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