On this day in 1630, a Pilgrim court came down hard on one of the settlers. They ordered that he be put in the stocks, that his house be burned, that all his goods be confiscated and that ultimately he be exiled. His name was Thomas Morton and they said he was a danger to society. He said (and later got an English court to agree) that they were just envious of his success. For a while guys like Miles Standish and Winthrop and Endicott went prithee- ing about, Morton was cornering the fur trade with the Indians. The method he used became an American marketing standby - - one that in a less sensitive and not politically correct era (or in a Jimmy Cagney movie) was called Booze & Broads. Shortly after he arrived, he noticed that the Indians had already noted that the Pilgrims were not your basic laugh a minute guys - - and that attending one of their socials was as pleasant as having root-canal work. So remembering the giddy youth of England, Morton picked a nice spot outside of town, put up a Maypole, broke out some jugs and invited some of towns young ladies to join him. (Wouldst thou with the A on thy apron followeth me?) Soon there was dancing, revelry and carryin on. The Indians could see that this was a good deal more fun than watching some geezer polish the buckle on his hat. Soon they were flocking to Mortons Maypole and bringing furs as a gesture. Morton was getting richer by the day. So the Pilgrims raided Mortons Ma-Re-Mount (called Merry Mount in the court papers). Thats when they shipped him off to England. When he returned to America with a writ to have his goods restored, the good Pilgrim Fathers slammed him into jail and wouldnt let him see anyone. They kept him there until he went mad and was safe to be released - - thus proving what Sister Herman Joseph said -- drinking and fooling around with girls will drive you crazy.
Posted on: Thu, 18 Sep 2014 00:12:37 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015