One big thing that wasnt mentioned. Social Media. This isnt a gender specific issue, as far as domestic violence and physical and emotional abuse. I am glad this article wasnt written that way. But often an overlooked sign of control and emotional abuse is the monitoring or eliminating social media that an abuser uses as a tool to isolate. Jealousy is human nature. Its not normal though OR healthy nor should anyone take it as anything but a warning, if a partner whos been completely forthcoming (this can be a different situation if theres been cheating) has to prove their trustworthiness over and over again. If you have FB buds who either are going through whats said in article or you can see patterns of a partner isolating another, speak up. Problem is, multifaceted when it comes to abuse and Im not a clinical professional. But the problem with domestic violence and emotional abuse is subtle at first. But it almost ALWAYS escalates. The person being abused may not be able to see it, because we are conditioned to find an all encompassing love, as an ideal. But even those who are insecure, dont micromanage a partners social media and/or cell phone. Those who are insecure and have the ability to be violent and emotionally abusive will do that, though. You may not be able to get a friend to see that they are in an abusive situation, especially in its initial stages. So dont take it personally. Just let them know you are around if they need them. And try to keep contact in person, if not by phone. Dont leave a digital trail if you suspect abuse in a friend or a family member (i.e. dont text or email concern, try to convey that verbally, either in person or on the phone,unless you suspect phone calls being monitored, too) . That rarely ever works as a deterrent for an abuser. What it does do, and its not YOUR fault, is make the abuser even angrier. I have friends who are clinical professionals. I hope they will chime in. Again, I can only hope that people seek professional help for this, who are a victim of this. But ultimately, to lessen the victimization, you can only provide subtle support. While its painful to watch a friend or a family member go through this, forcing the issue when someone is in crisis, they ARE NOT going to be able to differentiate force from a partner and well meaning force from a friend who wants them out of a bad domestic situation and/or relationship. Be kind and compassionate for friends and loved ones who are going through this...
Posted on: Mon, 24 Nov 2014 02:49:26 +0000
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