Only two more days and Im going under the knife. Yikes!! Can you believe how quickly three week flew by? Ive been asked by several people how Im feeling, am I nervous or anxious or excited? Im all of those!! Im really excited to have finally reach this milestone without cheating. Not once did I cheat but oh lord were the temptations there. My mind playing games with me both consciously and unconsciously. (Sorry about popping you in the mouth for stealing my stale Krispy Kreme Fran :-)). Ive gone through cravings. I mean at one point I would have given ANYTHING to have had a hot boiled egg with salt & pepper. And oh goodness the cheese drawer has been calling my name this whole time. Its so funny because we ALWAYS have a dozen boiled eggs in the fridge for our cobb salads or egg salad or whatever. Ive never craved them like this before and I know its just because I cant have it right now. And the cheese again is always there and never been this much of a want. When I went to Wal~mart yesterday I immediately saw those glazed donuts at the front door and thought gee they get you as soon as you step over the threshold with all the junk food......and I walked on by. Pretty proud of myself to recognize this because that will come in very handy once I can eat again and go shopping. Now if only the fritos would quit calling me to their aisle. Sheesh I dont even eat fritos!!! LOL Im anxious to see how this procedure will REALLY help me control my appetite and how much I end up eating. Ive recognized my short comings and Im working on overcoming these even now. I just HAVE to go to bed with a full belly or I cant sleep. This is a HUGE battle right now because Im still saving my jello for bedtime and not eating it during the day just so my belly is full. I make sure I have 2 opti-fast shakes at night instead of pacing them every 3 hours apart. :-( Recognizing this is 1/2 the battle because I know what to work on and hopefully will be able to overcome this obstacle. Im nervous because geesh its a surgery!!! I know what to expect. 30 mins of surgery, about 15 mins in recovery and the walking, walking & more walking. They dont let you sit down very long before they have you up walking and trying to get the anesthesia gas out of your system. I also HAVE to eat something because Im diabetic. If I remember correctly Dad had apple juice (which I already know I DONT want), apple sauce, clear broth and room temp water. Oh My Gosh that just sounds like so MUCH to me that Im really worried about not being able to get all that down. if you dont eat.....you dont leave. :-( I want the surgery over & done with and just be starting the recovery process already. I did want to tell you guys one thing Ive done since day one of this liquid diet. I usually every night had some popcorn and some roasted peanuts as a snack while I read my book before bed. Ive really missed my popcorn & peanuts.....a LOT!! But to make sure I had a really strong will power and to show those peanuts they couldnt & wouldnt control me Ive left a ziploc bag of roasted peanuts right next to my bed. That bag has been in my face every single night.....and I mean its RIGHT there and I see it just as clearly as I see my bed. Temptation? Oh hell yeah!!! If I was going to cheat it would have been with those peanuts for sure. But instead of hiding them away Ive left them where I could see them and prove to myself once & for all that Im the one in control and food will NOT control me once Ive had my surgery. The surgery is ONLY a tool, but I have the POWER to make my life better and its going to take ME making these changes in lifestyle. So those peanuts were defeated before the game even started. :-) So I got this even with my nerves, my thoughts, my cravings and my EXCITEMENT raging inside me. Folks, I. GOT. THIS!!! With your help, suggestions, support, encouragement and love folks I got this!!!! ♥
Posted on: Wed, 09 Jul 2014 02:25:39 +0000
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