Overcoming Guilt Associated With Mental Illness ‘Guilt is anger directed at ourselves’- Peter McWilliams ‘I am a weak person for having this illness’ ‘If I didn’t do something in my past, my family wouldn’t have to be going through this’ ‘This is allmy fault’ ‘Everyone must think I am a failure’ Are these thoughts familiar? With mental illness comes a lot of very intense and overwhelming feelings, such as anger, shame, embarrassment and despair. Unfortunately, many people also experience the complicated feelings of guilt. When looking up the meaning of guilt, the most common definitions seemed to be ‘the remorse caused by feeling responsible for some offence’, ‘responsible for wrongdoing’ and ‘the feeling of having done wrong or failed in an obligation’. Sounds more like the way a criminal should be feeling, doesn’t it? Consider for instance that you had broken your finger or caught the flu. Would you blame yourself? Would you feel guilty for being unwell? Would you think it happened because of something you had done or failed to do in your past? Would you think your family believes that you are a weak and incapable person? You would probably be more likely to see a doctor, do what you are told and accept help from friends and family to ensure you recover as quickly as possible. Mental illness should be treated in the same way. Anxiety and depression are real illnesses with real symptoms. Just like all other diseases, there is nothing one can do to prevent from getting them. They can happen to the best of us and there is no reason one should feel guilty about having them. Guilt can have a number of negative effects on the sufferer. It can make one feel over-responsible for not only their illness, but also for other matters in life. This may result in overworking oneself in order to try and make everyone else happy, sometimes forgetting about one’s own happiness. It tends to cause people to fuss over every action they make and the negative consequences their actions may have on others. Some people may even be so overcome by guilt that they ignore all of their other emotions, meaning they are unable to experience the positive sensations in life that we all should enjoy. So how can we overcome guilt? Like all other situations, admitting you have a problem is the first step. The number one thing you can do is to acknowledge that you are feeling guilty about your mental illness. The next thing to do is to recognise and understand the affect that this guilt has on you and the role it plays in your life. This may include reflecting on questions such as: • Why do I feel guilty? Ask yourself why exactly you are feeling guilty and what it is you are feeling guilty about • What are the consequences of feeling guilty? Question the effect that your guilt is having on yourself and those around you, think about the positive and negative consequences • What do I hope to achieve by feeling guilty? Consider what feeling guilty is doing for you and whether or not it is accomplishing anything • How would my life be different if I didn’t feel guilty? Imagine a life guilt free and ponder upon all the positive differences between this life and the life you are living now, also think about how you might go about this Answering these questions won’t rid you of your guilt immediately, but they may give you a good indication as to where your guilt is stemming from and how destructive it really is. Guilt is a very strong emotion that can take over your mental health in a very detrimental way. It causes a great deal of unnecessary anxiety, and tends to be counterproductive to what you are trying to achieve- an anxiety free life! By Monica (former ADAVIC Volunteer) References mifa.org.au/sites/mifa.org.au/files/documents/UnderstandingGuilt_001.pdf
Posted on: Tue, 13 May 2014 01:55:00 +0000
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