Pablos Letter to Gabula IV, the new Kyabazinga Busoga Ok, its funny but with some sense. Gungumala Kyabazinga waiffe William Wilberforce Nadiope Gabula IV! Pablo: Letter to Gabula IV, the new Kyabazinga PABLO HUMOUR Thursday, 28 August 2014 20:26 Written by Pablo kimuli Dear H R H William Wilberforce Nadiope Gabula IV, Congrats upon being elected the Kyabazinga of Busoga kingdom. “Amasanu galikundita baaba” (happiness is killing me). My entire neighbourhood is on rampage; they have bought all the chapatti, out of excitement. The chapatti sellers have tripled prices but folks are buying them like they have been hired. As you know, chapatti has been associated with Busoga because nobody on earth fries it better than your subjects. Even those that aren’t Basoga but make good chapatti are nicknamed ‘Munna.’ Maybe that explains why the best catering institutes in Uganda are found in your kingdom. It has been six years of waiting to fill the kyabazinga vacuum, since the untimely death of Henry Wako Muloki in September 2008. There could never be a better choice for the throne other than you. You are compliant on Facebook, Twitter, WhatsApp, Instagram, goodness me! You are swaggerific. I hear that your five-year tenure is a temporary provision. Don’t worry about this, our dear Kyabazinga. The beauty about this country is that temporary things often become permanent. Things that are pending always ‘pend’ till we forget that they are pending. Besides, once in power, you can always amend the constitution since it’s the order of the day. The task ahead is not simple. The Uganda Aids Indicator Survey 2011 preliminary report, conducted by the ministry of Health, Uganda Bureau of Statistics with the support of several American and European development organisations as well as the World Health Organisation, shows that your subjects are the most promiscuous. Some 30.5 per cent of the men confessed they had shared a bed with more than one woman during the previous 12 months. This kind of energy should be redirected to farming. Basoga have been stereotyped as nonconformists. In this era of globalization, tribal sentiments should be no more. Now that Buganda is collecting ‘Ettoffaali’ to support their financial muscle, you should start collecting ‘Akamooli’ so that we can finish constructing our Budhumbula palace. You need to take advantage of the population census to know how many subjects you have in the kingdom. That will give you a rough estimate of how many ‘bumooli’ we can collect in five years. Finally, you need to reel in more tourists to visit the kingdom. Busoga is endowed with beautiful sites such as Owen Falls dam, Bujagali falls, and source of the Nile. You can borrow a leaf from Bugisu. They have identified the Imbalu circumcision ceremony as something unique in their culture that can capture international attention. Likewise, since most Basoga are gifted at making chapatti, you can organize an annual chapatti frying festival. I have seen bazungu leave their air-conditioned offices to cross to the dusty streets of Kampala to buy a “rolex”, not the watch but eggs rolled in chapatti. Gungumala Kyabazinga waiffe William Wilberforce Nadiope Gabula IV! Mwino mu Baino, Pablo
Posted on: Sat, 30 Aug 2014 10:30:47 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015