Percy? Percy took in the voice, heard the heavy footsteps behind him, but he made no movement to indicate that he had. He had been sitting on the front step for the better half of two hours, and nobody had bothered to look for him. Percy wasnt surprised, however, everyone had more important things on their mind than the disappearance of a traitorous Weasley. Everyone, it seemed, except for Charlie. Charlie sighed as he sat down beside his younger brother, examining the pale cheeks which caused the freckles to stand out, and the red, puffy eyes beneath horn-rimmed glasses that were too big for his face. Mate, what are you doing out here? Charlie asked, throwing a blanket he had brought out over Percys shoulders. It might be nearly Summer but the nights are still freezing. Come inside where its warmer. Percy didnt reply, hardly acknowledging the blanket or his brothers presence. Charlie frowned. It was nearing midnight, yet the house behind them still bustled with light and noise. Nobody had been able to sleep. The night before last, the war had ended and had been won, but there were heavy losses too. The cost had been great for the Weasley family, and returning home with one less brother had been too much for some. George had locked himself in the bathroom after breaking every mirror in the house, and if Charlie listened carefully, he could still make out his mothers sobbing drifting through the walls. Everyone had been so occupied with their worry for Molly and George, along with their own heartbreak that they hadnt been keeping an eye on Percy who seemed to be taking it nearly as hard as Freds own twin. From the second they arrived at the Burrow, Charlie kept a watch on Percy who had sat in the corner of the kitchen, staring at the clock -Freds hand had switched back to home- before leaping to his feet and hurrying out the front door. After almost two hours, Charlie had decided to go look for him, surprised to find he had only gone just outside the door. Percy? Talk to me, Charlie said softly. Its not like you to be so quiet. For the first time, Percys head snapped towards Charlie, and the older brother couldnt help but curse whoever had given the Weasley males all the same eyes. The same shade of blue, the same shape.. He could look at Percys eyes and just see Freds, but whereas Freds would have been full of life and laughter, Percys were swimming with tears and tinged with despair. Perce, Charlie tried again, desperately wanting to reach the brother who was, once again, slipping away. I... I didnt.. We... We were.. Percy trailed off. It was strange for Charlie to see his brother like this. He used to be willing to give anything to get Percy to shut up for five minutes, but now the trouble was getting Percy to say any words at all. What is it? Charlie asked. I never got hurt, Percy whispered, tearing his gaze away from Charlie. What do you mean? I mean... Bill got attacked by the werewolf, you.. Last night, you got hexed by that Death Eater which you probably dont recall as you blacked out for a few minutes- Of course I remember that! How could I forget? Hurt more than a dragon burn, Charlie said, a small smile tugging at his lips. Ron got poisoned, George lost an ear, Percy went on as if Charlie hadnt interrupted. Ginny was taken into the chamber.. And F-Fred.. Fred was... Percy, whats your point? My point is that I was never really hurt, was I? Percy enquired. I never suffered, not like you all did.. And I deserved it. You didnt deserve- I did, Charlie! I left! Percy insisted. I should have died! I deserve to be dead. Charlie felt all the air leave his body and he grabbed Percys shoulder, forcing his brother to look at him. What would that solve, Percy? Wed just be in the same amount of pain as we are now. Percy snorted. No, you wouldnt. I was-I am the odd one out. Dont deny it. I am the traitor and yet, I was the only one who never suffered like the rest of you did. I should have.. I did wrong.. But I was never hurt. Youre hurting now, Charlie pointed out. Thats different. It bloody well isnt! Charlies nails were digging into Percys shoulder so tightly that the younger red-head winced. What? Just because you dont have visible injures? Physical scars? Do you want some? Merlin Percy, how could you think like that? We care about you! We love you! You didnt see how upset everyone was when you left. Dont look at me like that, we were! You made a mistake and youre damn well paying for it now. Stop putting so much of the blame on yourself. I left, Percy said. Fred was right there.. I should have pushed him aside but I didnt! I didnt save him.. I let him die. I was the traitor and Fred still died. George, was all Charlie said. S-Sorry? Percy sniffled. Hes put this in your head, hasnt he? Charlie removed his hand from Percy. He said all this to you. Percy looked stricken. Its true though, isnt it? He said. Hes right. Thats rubbish, Percy, Charlie said, frowning. You know it is. George only said those things because hes upset. Hes grieving. Hell come around. But he was right, Charlie.. He was. I left and- So what? Charlie snapped. You know what people say about me? That I ran away! I deserted my family to go off chasing dragons, but do I hide myself away? Do I sit in a room and blame myself? No. I was following my dreams. You all knew that and you respected it. Thats different, Percy repeated but he sounded less confident than last time. How? Charlie demanded, his eyes burning with anger. Because I didnt abandon my family? Percy, you made a mistake, okay? Get that through your head. At least you were there when F-Fred died. I wasnt. At least you saw him in his final moments. I distracted him. I made a joke that wasnt even funny, Percy said, tears slid down his cheeks. Harry had told Charlie all about that. You kept him laughing, Percy, Charlie whispered. He died with a smile on his face, and nobody except you can say they put that there. That last one was because of you. He died happy. He would have been happier not to die at all. Thats not the way the world works, Perce, Charlie said. It sucks and its cruel but thats the way it is. George will come around- Hes not the only one who thinks that way, Charlie. Well whoever else says anything to make you feel like this will have to get through me, Charlie growled. Even the voices in my head? Percy laughed bitterly. Especially them, Charlie replied, standing up and pulling Percy to his feet. Dont run anymore, Percy. Please dont pull away. Youre home now. Just be grateful that Fred knew the truth, that you got to him and apologised, and he saw that you werent a... A... Charlie struggled to think of something. A ghost of a smile made its way across Percys face. A ministry-loving, family-disowning, power-hungry moron? He suggested. Charlie chuckled. Yes, exactly that, he agreed. Come on, Percy. Come inside. Ill make you something to eat and then youre going to get some sleep, okay? Im afraid to sleep, Percy admitted. Nightmares.. Ive had them since the war started. Well, youre not having any tonight, Charlie said. Ill kick their asses. Promise? I promise. Im sorry I left, Charlie, Percy blurted out. Im sorry for everything I said. Its in the past. Things are hard enough without adding guilt into it. You came back, thats what matters. You came back, and despite what George says, we all forgave you the second that you did. Its time you forgave yourself too. Percy nodded. Ill try, he said. That was the best Charlie could hope for. Thank you. Any time, Percy. Dont ever forget that, Charlie assured him. Charlie? Percy said as they turned to go back inside. Hmm? Did you trust I would come back? Percy asked. Did you know I would realise how stupid I was being and come home? Even if Fred hadnt died or the war hadnt ended, did you think for just a second that I would return? Charlie smiled, albeit sadly before he pulled the younger Weasley into a hug. Percy was acting as if he were a young, lost child but he sunk into Charlies arms like an old man who could no longer bare the weight he once could. Charlie gripped tighter, trying to convey in that one small embrace that even though, at that moment, nothing was all right, one day it would be. He knew by the way Percy relaxed at his next words, that he believed him. I never had a doubt, little brother. ~ Ebony
Posted on: Sun, 21 Sep 2014 04:16:25 +0000
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