Please forget me... By James Hayes Her hands were trembling to some extent, as she gripped the cold metal grip, her fingertips dance skilfully across the surface. With a hurried movement the difficulty was kaput and the clear liquid flowed liberally, stretching out along the cold porcelain curving of the bath. The water ran, pooling at the end, before rising, rippling under the pressure of its peers, each drop skirmishing for its own space in the tub. As her own tiny ocean began to lap at the shore of the bath she returned the faucet to its original position, stemming the disorder, only a last few drops absconding. The thoughts in her mind still rippled like the water once had, she only wished for the storm to calm so she could rest. Opening the bottle she let the pills drop into her hand, several fell to the floor; her stare did not move her only focus was finding shelter from the storm that was uncontrolled inside her skull. Taking a deep breath in help the tension to ease, hesitantly she stepped into the bath, unsettling the peace that the water had just found. For just a moment, her breath caught, for inside her chest her heart was pounding with a throbbing she had never known. Again she hesitated, and then serenity washed over her, as the warmth of the water flowed through her. She knew this was what she needed. Her sharp expression smoothed as the water began to calm her, cleansing every part of her being. Giving into the gentle touch of the water she exhaled deeply, breathing out her troubles. With uncertainly her mind began to wander, reaching out for a long forgotten time of bliss to recite endlessly in her thoughts. She painted the scene in her mind, a time without worry or regret, without commitments or disappointment, a time of inner peace. Crystal clear dew drops ran down leaf slops, in a slapdash fashion falling off the edge, blissful and clear minded, longing adventure, for the thrill and unknown that waited. The wind rang its fingers through her flowing hair, the flowers outstretched, reaching towards her to be picked up like a small child yearning for their mother. The warm touch of the sun cascaded across the meadow, illuminating every minor element, a moment iced up in time; a moment where nothing at all mattered. It was paradise. However the longer she allowed herself to indulge in the memory the more it distorted, twisting against her. The flowers recoiled from her touch, the sky darkened, angered from her presence. The air was cold. The storm had found her, she began to run, and she knew she could not hide for long her but that short moment had been enough, she was confident in her decision. She let go. The fight inside her was gone, the war was over. No longer was there any pain, or struggle. Calm; at last everything was now calm, the storm clouds parting forever. A clang echoed though the bathroom as the cool metal object slipped from her fingertips. The warmth flowed from her, the water around her now tepid and tinged scarlet. Her body was distressed and drained from the battle she had fought. Fought within her, a war which could not be won or lost, for the fight was with her-self. Water began to fill her lungs, but do not be fooled she was not drowning, for at last, she could finally breathe. At last she could rest. Upon the floor was a lined, crumbled notebook page, ripped out, its edges sloppily torn. Heavy crease lines covered it, each fold line in the page, telling the story of how many times this ended had approached, only for something to change its course. Scrawled across the page in smudged black ink were only two words. The long battle for her life, and this was the result. Just two little words, to express her struggle, express her final wish. Please forget me.
Posted on: Sun, 21 Jul 2013 11:11:28 +0000
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