Post anon. Here goes, maybe this helps, maybe not. Im sure I already know what I need to do, but at this point its ridiculous. My wife and I have been separated for almost a year, not legally but she lives with mom and I live here. Its hard coming home on a daily basis, my heart is heavy every time I walk through the door to a practically empty house. One of our dogs she left behind is the only thing that even remotely lifts up my spirits at the end of the day. Ladies, I completely understand what you go through on a deployment, a tip of my hat to you. She is in my mind more often than not, everything, how she cheated on me during deployment (she is/was younger than me, I dont hold it against her but still it does carry some weight. I do forgive, eventually Ill forget) then how I drunkenly laid hands on her one night, I ended up in Cumberland Hall a week later for attempted suicide (couldnt find a real legitimate reason to pull the trigger so I called my nco to inform him) and everything in between. I wonder if she ever loved me at all. I was there in the relationship but not in the moment. That was a fault of mine that I never knew I could let my guard down, all I see and hear are bad things about military relationships, but then I found her and took a chance. My issue is, guy friends. I admit I do get jealous. Ive seen the way she talks to these guys. She swears theyre just friends but my gut says something else. Ive tried to meet up on the middle with if I dont like the vibe I get dont talk to them. Most of them I dont like, others I dont mind. This distance is killing the relationship, all I keep hearing is ill be home soon (we just spent Christmas together) but no date is set in stone. She lies a lot. I wonder if what we had was real. Ive been patient but it seems like theres always something else keeping her up there. Ive asked for a divorce, she says she still loves me and wont sign them. What do I do? I just want to move forward. I wont talk to other women while Im in a relationship but I feel with all the lies, disrespecting my wishes and acting like its okay to talk the way she does to other guys that Im justified to leave. What do I do? This is extremely frustrating. Ladies, guidance please.
Posted on: Wed, 14 Jan 2015 23:50:20 +0000
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