Q. Why wasnt there any food left after the monster party? A. Because everyone was a goblin! Q. What is a mummys favourite type of music? A. Rap music. Q. Where do baby ghosts go when their mom goes to work? A. A scare centre! Q. What is a skeletons favourite instrument? A. The trombone. Q. Where do movie stars go on Halloween? A. MaliBOO! Q. Why didnt Dracula have any friends? A. He was a pain in the neck! Q. What does a bird say at Halloween? A. Twick or tweet. Q. What does a panda ghost eat? A. Bam-BOO! Q. What do you call a skeleton that lies on its grave? A. Lazy bones! Q. What did one casket say to the other casket? A. Is that you coffin? (coughing) Q. Who did Dracula bring to the prom? A. His ghoul friend. Q. What key opens a Haunted House? A. A spooKEY! Q. What is Draculas favourite fruit? A. A nectarine. Q. What did the mummy ghost say to the noisy young ghost who kept interrupting? A. Spook when youre spooken to. Q. What kind of mail does a superstar vampire get? A. Fang mail. Q. What is the problem with two twin witches? A. You never know which witch is which! Q. Where did the ghosts go for vacation? A. Mali-BOO. Q. What pants do ghosts wear? A. BOO jeans. Q. What do you call a witch who likes the beach but is scared of the water? A. A chicken sand witch. Q. What does a ghost call his mom and dad? A. His transparents. Q. What did the skeleton order with his drink? A. A mop. Q. Why did the mummy get a headache? A. Because he was GOBLIN his candy! Q. Who won the zombie war? A. Nobody, it was dead even. Q. Where did the ghost go on vacation? A. The BOO-hamas! Q. Why did Dracula go to the library? A. He wanted a good book to sink his teeth into! Q. How do phantoms travel? A. Ghost to ghost. Q. What kind of TV do you find inside a haunted house? A. A wide scream TV. Q. What did the witch say when she fell in the moat? A. My eels are killing me! Q. What do you call candy corn? A. Pumpkin poop! Q. What do you get when you cross a vampire with a mummy? A. Either a flying bandage or a gift wrapped bat! Q. What school subject is a witch good at? A. Spelling. Q. What did the ghosts eat for dinner? A. Spoke! Q. What did the pumpkin need for its boo boo? A. A pumpkin patch. Q. Why is it hard for a ghost to tell a lie? A. Because you can see right through him. Q. What do you call a witch at the beach? A. A sand-witch. Q. Why couldnt the skeleton cross the road? A. Because he didnt have the guts. Q. Why did the skeleton go scuba diving? A. Because he wanted to get some muscles! Q. Why did the vampire give up acting? A. Because he couldnt find a part he could sink his teeth into. Q. Why was the skeleton scared to cross the road? A. Because there was a dog on the other side. Q. What do skeletons say before they start to eat? A. Bone appetite. Q. What do ghosts serve for dessert? A. I scream. Q. What monster wears the most clothes? A. A werewolf! Q. How do you make a witch itch? A. Take away her W. Q. What did the ghost teacher say to her class? A. Watch the board and Ill go through it again. Q. Why didnt the skeleton want to go to the dance? A. Because he had no body to go with. Q. Why did the skeleton stand in the corner during his prom? A. Because he had no body to dance with! Q. What is a witchs favourite food? A. Goulash. Q. Why was the little ghost crying? A. Because he wanted his mummy. Q. What did the jack-o-lantern say to the other jack-o-lantern when they were on their way to a Halloween party? A. Lets get glowing. Q. What do you get when you cross a mummy with a vampire bat? A. A flying Band-Aid. Q. Why do witches fly around on broomsticks? A. Because vacuum cleaners are too heavy! Q. What do you do when you see a ghost? A. Run away of course! Q. Where does a vampire keep his money? A. In a blood bank. Q. What do you call a vampire 200 miles from a blood bank? A. A cab. Q. Why dont skeletons play music in church? A. They have no organs. Q. What kind of dog does a vampire have? A. A bloodhound. Q. What do you get when you cross a ghost, a dog and a rooster? A. A cockatoo! Q. What did one ghost say to the other ghost? A. Long time no see. Q. What did the werewolf eat after hed had his teeth cleaned? A. The dentist. Q. What do goblins and ghosts drink when theyre hot and thirsty on Halloween? A. Ghoul-aid! Q. What do you call a mummy eating in bed? A. A crummy mummy. Q. Where do you go when a ghost is chasing you? A. To the living room! Q. What is a skeletons favourite drink? A. Milk, its white and good for your bones. Q. When do vampires like horse racing? A. When its neck and neck! A. What do you get when you cross a ghost and a goblin? Q. I dont know, but it doesnt sound good to me! Q. What do you call a fat vampire slayer? A. Puffy! Q. Why did the Cyclops close his school? A. Because he only had one pupil. Q. Why didnt the ghost go boo? A. Because it had no guts. Q. What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire? A. Frostbite. Q. What do you call two witches who share a broom? A. Broom mates. Q. What do you call two witches that live together? A. Broom mates. Q. What do you call a nervous witch? A. A twitch. Q. What do you call ghosts that ring doorbells? A. Dead ringers. Q. What does a ghost keep in its stable? A. Nightmares. Q. How do ghosts like their eggs? A. Terror-fried. Q. How was Frankenstiens birth? A. Shocking. Q. Why cant you tell a skeleton a secret? A. Because it goes in one ear and out the other. Q. What do you call a dead person in the closet? A. The 1966 hide-and-go-seek champion. Q. What kind of streets do zombies live on? A. Dead-ends. Q. Why dont mummies take vacations? A. Theyre afraid theyll relax and unwind. Q. What kind of candy wont a ghost touch? A. Life Savers. Q. What happens when a ghost haunts a theatre? A. The actors get stage fright. Q. What song do vampires hate? A. You are my sunshine! Q. What did the little ghost say to his mom? A. Ive got a boo boo. Q. What is a ghosts favourite ride? A. A roller-ghoster. Q. What do witches call for in a hotel room? A. Broom service. Q. What do you get if you cross a skeleton with a famous detective? A. Sherlock Bones! Q. What do you call an overweight pumpkin? A. A plumpkin! Q. How do you make a skeleton laugh? A. Tickle its funnybone! Q. What is worse than being a three hundred pound witch? A. Being her broom. Q. What do vampires never order at a cafe? A. A STAKE sandwich! Q. What did one ghost say to the other? A. Do you believe in people?! Q. What do vampires sing on New Years Eve? A. Auld Fang Syne! Q. Where do ghosts get their mail? A. At the ghost office. Q. What do skeletons say at the front door? A. Crick or creak! Q. What kind of girl does a mummy take on a date? A. Any old girl he can dig up. Q. Why was the big hairy , two-headed monster top of the class in school? A. Because two heads are better than one. Q. Frankenstein and Dracula had a match. Who won? A. Frankenstein, because Dracula sucks! Q. What do you get when you cross a moose and a ghost? A. A cariboo! Q. Why doesnt a witch wear a flat hat? A. Because theres no point in it! Q. What do monsters order in fast food restaurants? A. French FRIGHTS! Q. Why dont you eat ghosts? A. Theyll go right through you. Q. What games do bats like to play on Halloween? A. Anything with a ball. Q. What do you read on Halloween? A. BOO-ks Q. Why cant Dracula play baseball? A. He lost his bat. Q. What time is it when you see costumes, a house, candy and hear trick-or-treat? A. Halloween! Q. What do you get when you cross a hot dog and Halloween? A. A Hallo-weenie! Q. Whats a vampires favourite part of the guitar? A. The neck.
Posted on: Thu, 31 Oct 2013 17:41:07 +0000