Qisaas and Ramadan. Friday-July 2013. Like a mentioned earlier, writing with a pen is a habit I have to re-learn.also writing without a table and enough light are conditionds that I am adapting to. My writings for the above reasons and the sweltering heat of the monsoon season here, may seem haphazard. However; I wish this to be relatively more articulate. I intend to write about how my ramadan(fasting month) is favouring me in jail- for my sister I have to go into details that otherwise I would not have mentioned. Plus I have to write about Qisaas/blood money that I must ask people to donate to. I will try explaining the why and what of it all. The ‘B’etter class cells are different from the common class cells-these are single bed rooms with a ceiling fan and an exhaust fan, and a metallic bed with no sheets, the inmate is supposed to get his own bedding- there is an attached bath + water supply is on at dawn,noon,after noon, dusk and 9:00 pm- one stores water in buckets and plastic tubs, drinking water is cool enough since ice is sold by the jail personnel. In B class each inmate is given a companion, someone already sentenced to a rigourous punishment+ that “valet” cooks,washes+cleans for the ‘B’class inmate- From 6am to 4/5 pm. There are 2 windows on either side of the bedroom,looking out onto the lawn in the front and the alley on the rear. Food is ones own choice- I normally spent my days, ( as outside) with tea and ate dinner after lockup from 6-pm to 6am- when alone in my cell. In Ramadan I ask the ‘valet’ to boil to a 100gms each of patatoes and chick peas and them with freshly cut tomatoes,onions,green chillies, some salt and black pepper in 450gms of yougurt. This lasts me from dusk till dawn, of course I take tea after the sunset prayers, then after 9.00pm prayers and once after midnight. I sleep only after sunrise to wake around 1pm Since I am fasting from dawn to sunset, waking up at 1pm and going without tea and stuff(naswaar-chewable tabacco) till 7pm Is easier especially because the noon and afternoon obligatory prayers are delivered at leisure. I have refrained from asking for T.v or a radio or newspaper because I know it would be unwise giving my senses to the programme producers or news editors, even if for a short while. I use my senses and my time reading and contemplating and analysing whatever has happened and is happening around myself and in myself. If I said that being imprisoned for nearly 13 months now has been an answer to a prayer that my soul had covertly continued since june 2007, I would be telling the truth. From 2002-2007 in trying to restore a humane balance of sensitivity to personal responsibility, in my patients’ hearts and minds, I had forgotten that the medium of lies and pretensions that the selfishness of a capitalist( materialistic) society creates, will eventually engulf me too. And till 2007 till 2012, I was sinking and surfacing repeadtely, although the result off the philosophy I employed for rehablitating muslim addicts, were improving with each day- yet myself, being without an earnest and dedicated system of feed-back, was burning out. Jail has helped me relax and analyse everything in third sight. My own mistakes that I was oblivious to are very clearly evident now. I was idealistic and not realistic. I was too keen for upholding principles, forgetting that principles are not human and thus too much focus on principles causes one to breach the principles of tolerance, moderation and thus dynamic honesty. Sustaining a balance between reality and theory is actual valour and I failed at it again and again. So yes jail has been a blessing. But not for my sisters, my nephews and my nieces and so I have asked ALLAH to allow me freedom once again. In jail I have formulated a new principle- listen to and obey my elder sister in islamabad like she is against my keeping a cell-phone in jail. So I havent. I manage calling once a week from the other inmates’ cell phone and I can smuggle hand-written notes to my neice and her mom. Besides I have no one to call from a cell-phone. Its actually painful for whoever one calls from jail. Now about Qisaas/blood money. Since the day I was arrested , minutes after the deceased died, june 27th 2012. All my belongings, checkbooks, ATM cards have been in the deseaseds’ familys’ custody. Even my documents- I managed B class because all my credantials were on the internet. I know I am as guiltless as an infant- but the twists to the police case, that my opponents ( being a lady singer’s family and their politician friend) managed have lead my lawyer to conclude that the shortest way out of jail and this case is to pay the blood money(Qisaas) to the widow. For one year my sisters have afforded me and the Qisaas/ blood money is nearly 35000/- Us dollars. Which they may not be able to gather. I am sure of it and so asking a few internet friends to contribute, through personal message to them. Luckily, the charity season in the muslim world, Ramadan ison and freeing a prisoner is very high among virtues as stated in Quran. For one year I had waited for someone other than my blood relatives to come forward and offer help. I thought. “if my life was of benefit to society, then people other than my family must offer help” also since myself and my sisters are foreign to this culture. I had to have locats on my side (2013) on the 10th of july (before sunset) Mr. Azeem, a retired D.G of Pakistan telecom came forward. I entrusted him the favour to try to contacting the widow and settling a number for the blood money. Mr.Azeem complained about my delay of one year before contacting him but I had no answers. His wife and him have done volunteer work for Rah-e-rast since 2005 and I asked my sister to contact Mrs. Azeem when the experienced inmates have suggested that a lady/ my sister should contact the widow and try for a compromise INSHA ALLAH. Hopefully things will turn favourably and I’ll manage being free again. (ameen) My neice should get Mr. Azeem’s bank account no. and send it out through personal messages to a few friends, I have written tweets for, to my neice.
Posted on: Mon, 22 Jul 2013 21:26:19 +0000