RANDOM NOTIONS BIMBO MANUEL HOME NEWS 1 DEAR KOLE, ‘Man’s mind stretched to a new idea never goes back to its original dimensions – Oliver Wendell Holmes I am hopeful that this meets you well as we are here. If so, doxology. I am gladdened by your receipt of my last mail which I noticed you have shared with many of your friends. That embarrassed me a little as I intended that you would help hide my poor writing abilities. Anyway, as always maintained, the words are of little consequence, it is the sequence of thought behind them that matters and I hope that as this made sense. I was quite glad to see Mama Agba when I went with Tokunbo to Ijebu. We ate Ikokore with cold eba which I had not had in eons. It was exquisitely cooked and served complete with the exotic aroma of ogiri and iru with molten palm oil dripping over the sides of the plate. Typical of Tokunbo, he wanted to use a spoon but Mama Agba would have none of it. I went on while they disagreed and held an intellectual discourse on the merits and demerits of eating ikokore with a spoon. You amused me a little when I read your reply requesting for news from home. I always thought the shrinking world claims that delivered news, rumors and all sorts to your phone, laptop, tab, etc. via social media and the general information was true even in your city. Anyway… I am sure you heard of the alarming reports to the panic of everyone at some point that the dreaded Ebola Virus had entered the Federal Capital Territory – where our president, senators, Honorable Reps, ministers and every big man who has any claim to bigness has preferred residence! I never believed it and I was proven right by the strident and insistent denial by none other than the Honorable Minister of Health, Professor Onyebuchi Chukwu and he should now, he is a professor and he is the minister in charge of all Ebola things! Can you just imagine what it would mean for Ebola to enter Abuja? Does it not imply that we will have to quarantine the directors, the ministers, the senators, the honorable Reps, the vice president, the endless queue of hangers-on and…the president! God forbid! What would have happened to all the underground campaigns? What would have happened to all the people who are waiting to sign the ‘JONA FOR PRESIDENT’ endorsement document begging the president to please do a second term? Hm, I hope you are praying vigorously, with head shaking violently where you are. Ah, God forbid, o!! I have been following proceedings in that regard for a bit. I saw on television what happened in the South East as more than three million begged the president to return! The South West outdid them however by collecting almost four million signatures! What further proof do you need that we love and appreciate the president more in the South West? Mama Luku and our other relations resident in Ibadan are still recovering from calf and ankle aches from having to walk long distances on the day South West PDP locked down Ibadan for Jona. Such was the impact and the expression of love. Of course you knew we always loved the president in this corner of Nigeria. I felt a little disappointed though that the South South managed to collect more signatures bringing in more than four million! How can we allow those people to beat us like that? Anyway, I take solace in what one of our mutual friends said: ‘You know the man is from there…they have to show everyone that they love him, o, even if they really don’t…ile la ti nko eso r’ode, now!’ Truly, charity begins at home. Abi, Kole? You may have been hearing all sorts of rumors and distorted facts about the popularity of the president but never mind those people in the North West, whether they endorse or not, it is Jona Forever! Mschew. Em, well true, they do have a mammoth voting bloc in Kano, Jigawa and Katsina but… So on to other things, please. There seems to be so much to tell you. The public relations man at army headquarters, I think his name is Gen Olukolade, finally opened a twitter account on August 14, 2014. I do not have the handle but as you are very familiar with these things I know you will be able to find it somewhere. It is not as open a secret as that of other people who want to be read on twitter and that is understandable – security things and all that. Please be sure to look for it so you can follow proceedings as the great Nigerian Army and support services battle Boko Haram to a standstill in North Eastern parts of the country where they have had the temerity, in seeming total disdain of the capability of our armed forces to declare a caliphate! Can you just imagine that? Thankfully though, the man has assured us that the rebels have taken only a small part and not all of that area. I have also heard on sound authority that the president never asked where Gworza was located in Nigeria in the presence of the traditional of the place who ran away to Abuja to seek refuge. He did not also wear a clueless look as was claimed in some reports. Anyway, I read in one of the local newspapers the other day a statement credited to the Honorable Speaker of the Honorable House of Representatives in which he was reputed to have said: ‘We are waiting for the report of the National Conference…’ I thought it was a rather ominous statement or maybe it was the way it was reported but they claimed to have quoted him. And then they quoted him again: ‘…when we get it, we will do justice to it…’! Ha! Even more ominous but I have chosen not to alarm you so I leave the inference to you. I do know though that many people are waiting too…for the report and the National Assembly’s tinkering. A friend of mine wants to be governor of Ijebu State and another the chairman of the capital city local government, Shagamu! They are already fighting and are not on speaking terms anymore over the disagreement of which city will be capital as the other insists it must be Ijebu Ode. And speaking of political disagreements, is it not just cute to find Otunba femi Pedro, our former deputy governor in Lagos State among the multitude in APC?! I just ‘dig’ the gentleman. He went, he saw and he returned! A humble man who wears his ‘party stalwart’ toga with deep humility, so much that people usually don’t know he is there! Knowing your tilt in favor of modesty, I thought that would interest you as well. Oh, Kole, how time flies! I must go back on location and you have to go to work but I will continue when I have another opportunity or if I see anything else I think may interest you. For now, my brother, ‘…awa nlo, o di’gba o se, ka ma f’iku ya’ra wa…’ Second bass gbe s’oke!
Posted on: Thu, 04 Sep 2014 10:07:29 +0000
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