RANDOM STUFF IN A MOTHERS HANDBAG HER MAMBAG :) Something to spit on - In the early days it was a cotton hanky, it later progressed to Kleenex tissues . Handy for all those Whats that on your face? moments. Dettol - For when spit just wont do and you want something that stings, cos you told the kids a hundred times.Dont walk on that wall. You will fall. And whilst I cleanse the wound, I want you to learn a lesson - Does it hurt? - Good! Every receipt for everything youve bought in the last ten years. Because who knows when you might want to take back a shoddy item- also in the handbag. I bought these Candles last year. It says on the pack that each one will burn for 60 hours And? five hours I had it burning for during the last power cut, and this stump is all thats left. I dont think Moses could make THAT burn for 55 hours. I want me money back. Hang on Ive got the receipt in me bag Birth certificates - 1 per child; For various reasons; What if your dad tries to kidnap you and take you abroad? (Ooh yes please) Hell have to go by bus, cos everywhere I go, the bag goes too (She even takes it to the toilet!) R Lesleys tall for her age. No way am I paying full fare for her on the bus. Anytime that conductor starts I just wave this in his face (Yeah but Im eight now and thats r melissas certificate. I think the conductor on the 163 is getting suspicious) That cheeky cow over the road asked me if you all had the same dad! You should have seen the look on her face, when I pulled out these. (Was is it anything like the look on mine, when you do embarrassing stuff like this?) She got on the wrong bus from shame...No way does she get the 17 to her mams hovel. That steep walk up Charlestown road will teach her a lesson Spare underwear: Yes the kids are all teenagers now- But you never know! Embarrassing photos (Because all the good ones are in frames, on the sideboard) Aw, do you want a laugh? Do you remember your feather cut?... I did that (How could I forget. You and your bloody K-Tel hairdressing kit - a comb with a razor attached...And what did you buy with the money you saved? - Soddin festoon nets. Still, at least they kept my haircut hidden from public view) This one would have been a lovely picture, if it wasnt for your lazy eye. R Karin looks so cute with that kiss curl, and you spoilt it. Youre so spiteful sometimes (I was THREE! and YOURE the lazy one. For not taking me for glasses with a patch cos you didnt want to be shown up) The remote control (since the 80s) Dont touch me Telly. I dont drink, I dont smoke. That telly is my social life and Im not risking it getting broke I only want to turn it over...Its not normal to keep the remote in your handbag I dont think you should be judging whats normal. Its not normal to break something within five minutes of it coming in the house. You could break water... You broke the stereogram by overloading it. Six singles at a time it said - Not EIGHT (Gawd - Let it go!) Well will you please turn the telly over? Let me just wipe me hands first and pass us me handbag Whats all that covering it? (Smug look) Clingfilm (pause for applause...get dirty look instead) Got the idea from Top tips, in me Take a Break I change it every other week. Had this remote for six months and it looks brand new... PS: If you enjoy my stories, do us a favour? please like and share my page.
Posted on: Sun, 27 Jul 2014 11:57:13 +0000
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