Rebecca is still in ICU recovering from her pancreatic surgery and back in a serious state of post-op pancreatitis. Historically an enzyme elevation of this magnitude equates to the rejection of her stents. If she rejects her stents, this would lead to another surgery she would be incapable of enduring without the aid of steroids. The steroids would then again, ravage Rebecca’s pancreas to create the situation we have now found ourselves in – a vicious, unending cycle. All medical professionals are in agreement that Rebecca’s damaged pancreas needs to be removed. But all said medical professionals fear whether my child can live through the necessary transplant in her current state. Especially with an unknown systemic disease. Early this morning I was reading in the Bible about a man named Naaman. Sleep was impossible – so I resorted to 2 Kings in a last ditch effort - thinking stories of unfaithful monarchs, idolatry, and gory battles would bring my mind peace???? Don’t judge – I am quite delirious these days…. I discovered that Naaman was a pagan with leprosy. He was commander of the army of the King of Aram who worshiped a god named Rimmon. Naaman suffered from a debilitating disease with no cure yet through his God-fearing Israelite slave, Naaman found healing. He encountered the prophet Elisha who gave him instructions to cure his affliction and Naaman’s “flesh was restored and became clean like that of a young boy (2 Kings 5:14).” But as incredible as Naaman’s restorative health was – the true miracle came straight from the very disease he pleaded to be rid of. It was because of Naaman’s agony and because of his unknown affliction that he uttered the words: “Now I know that there is no God in all the world except in Israel (2 Kings 5:15).” Through his physical ailment, Naaman’s soul found its home. There is no doubt that our Lord uses suffering throughout the Bible to reveal Himself. For just as the heathen Naaman found His Maker through leprosy.…and Christ’s power was unveiled through the man born blind….and the death of Stephan began an unstoppable evangelical movement….God is preforming wonders through Rebecca Elizabeth Taylor’s disease. I know it – I feel it – I experience it. But there are moments like today I am not strong enough to want what is best for God’s bigger plan. I want my boys to have a mother who buys their school supplies, drops them off for their first day of school and tucks them in at night - but God knows that. I want to sleep in the same bed with my husband and have a conversation that does not include a life-altering decision - but God knows that. I want a life that exists outside of the confines of this claustrophobic hospital room - but God knows that. I want Rebecca’s disease to be defined and then eradicated -but God knows that. And more than anything, at this particular moment, I want my daughter out of pain. But God knows that. So if my Lord intimately knows what my desires are and yet still allows Rebecca’s affliction to rage on – then I have to learn to accept the unseen. My situation may not make sense, but it doesn’t have to. The Creator of the universe does not need my approval before He uses my daughter’s illness to reveal His glory. And He is using her. Not just in the doctors, nurses, teachers, neighbors, friends and family’s lives that are surrounding her – but he is using this trial to transform my life as well: Rebecca’s journey gives me great patience. It affords me eternal perspective. It provides unyielding hope. A bleeding heart of compassion. A crazy dose of empathy. Supernatural love. And for the first time in my life, through this suffering – I am afforded an intimate glimpse of my Saviors hand. Whether I like it or not, the works of God are being displayed through Rebecca’s disease. So that everyone who knows her will not hesitate to utter the words that Naaman did: “Now I know that there is no God in all the world except in Israel” An unexpected miracle. Love to each and every one of you......
Posted on: Mon, 01 Sep 2014 03:40:35 +0000
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