Remember if you are dating a narcissist: 1. Narcissists have trouble with commitment. Your narcissistic partner might be dating you, but he or she may be on the look out for a different, potentially more attractive, romantic partner. Research shows that the inverse relation between narcissism and commitment can be explained by narcissists’ interest in alternative partners (Campbell & Foster, 2002). In other words, narcissists’ tendency to avoid committing to their partners is promoted by a habit of checking out other men or women who could be preferable partners. 2. Narcissists value being admired over emotional connection. Attempts to connect emotionally with narcissistic individuals can be unappealing to them. Evidence suggests that narcissists have an aversion to the caring and dependency that marks a close partnership, preferring instead partners who are highly positive and likely to provide self-enhancing admiration (Campbell, 1999). 3. Narcissists are more aggressive partners. How couples manage conflict can influence the quality of their interactions. According to recent research (Keller et al., 2014), more narcissistic individuals tend to engage in more aggression, which can take many forms (e.g., verbal, physical, unprovoked, provoked, stonewalling). These patterns make it difficult to engage in accommodation and other healthy forms of conflict resolution. 4. Narcissists are more open to cheating. When in a serious, monogamous relationship, narcissistic individuals are more will to risk an extra-dyadic encounter, such as a one-night stand or a booty-call (Adams, Luevano, & Jonason, 2014). Further, the greater individuals’ narcissism, the more willing they are to tolerate a greater chance of discovery by their partner in order to participate in these one-night stands or booty-calls. This finding corresponds with a tendency to resist commitment (Campbell & Foster, 2002). 5. Narcissists play games. When it comes to love, the greater individuals’ narcissism, the less likely they are to selflessly care about a partner’s well-being and the more likely they are to reject dependence in favor of power and freedom (Campbell, Foster, & Finkel, 2002). Game playing, or ludos, is their preferred love style. In addition to playing mind games, they are more apt to lie, manipulate, and overcontrol their partners. They flirt with others and hide their real personality (Campbell et al., 2002), making it very difficult to form a trusting partnership.
Posted on: Sat, 23 Aug 2014 11:35:49 +0000
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