Reminded of this article today as ive been slammed with neuropathic and muscular pain today. I pushed through it, but its very frustrating when all the energy i have is used up at work. Especially when the pain comes out of the blue and with no immediate explanation. Its too easy to be too hard on myself when this happens. I feel guilty and frustrated that at times i can barely catch up with everything and everyone. Or i worry that the people around me may feel put off when im quiet/distant. Im very aware that this sort of energy can be a hindrance in the process of learning how to work with what i CAN do to feel better. I need to stop disassociating myself from my body when it hurts. I need to be more gentle and patient with my body on the bad days. The more i recognize my limitations and know when to pick my battles (in other words, better know when pushing results in building strength and when it results in backtracking progress), the better chance i have to heal and bounce back faster. Im very thankful for the endless projects available to me on the bad days. Reading, making art, making music, studying, yoga, etc. Creativity is medicine. Im also thankful for the very wise and loving folks that have offered excellent insight along the way (Mom, Dad, Dani, Paul, etc.), and for everyone that has been positive and understanding. To the people that see the light, love, passion, strength and good energy that i try to focus on and share - THANK YOU for not defining, judging, or giving up on me based on this set-back. It affects me, and its certainly shaping me, but it doesnt define me. Im resilient (also, stubborn) and determined to continue to learn from it and work towards a better quality of life. So many opportunities and projects at my fingertips! I need more spoons.
Posted on: Thu, 28 Aug 2014 03:40:10 +0000
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