Review: The Hobbit: Battle of the Five Armies: 4/10 or D- Why does it hurt so much? is what I wondered constantly as Peter Jacksons final entry in the Hobbit Trilogy literally passed its gas on screen, and it was not pleasant. He Hobbit is nothing more than Peter Jacksons glorified vision of a fans wet dream, but its a falsity that not even we will fall for. Its a trilogy built on 3 years of film after film after film, functioning on pillaging and plundering rather than telling a real story. Jackson told us he was going to take us back to MIddle Earth fans rejoiced; when he told us hed take us back 3 times we were all a little confused; like the Hobbit is this tiny ass book and here you are making a trilogy. Filler. Filler. Filler. Thats all this feels like. Being the shortest of the three Hobbit films this one just happens to feel and drag out the longest because there are only brief moments of good filmmaking packed within a movie that is ultimately overstuffed with drivel, poor dialogue, melodramatic undertones, cliched storytelling and unintentional moments that literally make the audience laugh hysterically at its stupidity. I am not reviewing a book > movie adaptation but Jackson has no remorse as he strays from the book, adding characters and plot fillers with little to no purpose whatsoever besides to fuel his ego and apparently serve the fans (but not so when the fans end up shortchanged and unsatisfied). What is this movie trying to be? A separate story, a precursor to LOTR? Nobody knows because Jackson packs everything he can from pointless dialogue to poor character development especially in Thorin Oakenshield which comes seemingly out of nowhere and is not only unnatural, but just embarasing to say the least. There are bursts of epilepsy, a scene with Cate Blanchett that makes us ponder whether or not it was meant to look as jokeworthy as it is, a hallucination scene, the hero getting saved just as he is about to die and after all that - its more than clear just how painful it is to watch the Hobbit. Where an Unexpected Journey gave us new possibilities and made us want to return to Middle Earth, The Desolation of Smaug had more fillers and offered a less than amazing love triangle (which I felt was handled well by the actors involved) but was still a film that felt like it was moving forward. BOTFA is an excuse. Jackson boasts a 45 minute battle not for us, but because he has nothing else to do, everything else is just preparation. Not only is the dialogue cringeworthy, but so is the inconsistencies of the CG and special effects throughout this film. Great one moment, basically a cartoon the next, Jackson made us fall in love with LOTR because of its grand scale with the technology available; but all this film has done is abused technology and not only removed the audiences emotional attachment to the action altogether, but taken the magic out of the entire experience. LOTR may have had its faults but it had significant material to draw upon and a real sense of passion that was put into its construction. The Hobbit is no labour of love, its just another disappointment. 4/10
Posted on: Mon, 29 Dec 2014 11:46:03 +0000
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