Robin Williams. Our culture is grieving the loss of a legend. There is probably a select few personalities in our world whose death could have impacted the rest of us as much as his. An interesting byproduct of his apparent suicide is the barrage of articles and opinions that have come blasting out of the endless depths of the interwebz. Some are quite thoughtful while others are not…as is the way of it online. Of course the big focus now is on the “D” word. DEPRESSION. A word that has so many negative connotations and an attached stigma that probably rivals words like “leper” from a bygone era and “PTSD” in our modern time. As I became more interested in psychology and started practicing therapy, I thought often of Robin Williams. His ability to remain in character, a seemingly infinite supply of funny, diverse, spot-on characters…it started to take on a new meaning to me…WHO IS HE? Like…who is he…REALLY? It was hard to say because I couldn’t seem to get a grasp on him as a person…only him as a comedian or an actor. As Jamie Masada, a US comedy club pioneer, said: He was always in character - you never saw the real Robin. I knew him 35 years, and I never knew him. For me, with my therapist hat on…Robin Williams is the embodiment of an extreme reality that many of us face. WHO AM I? My guess is that Robin either believed that he didnt know who he was or, more likely, his thoughts about who he is…his core beliefs…were sad...so all-encompassingly sad that he could not see any way out…there was no relief. And not for a lack of trying. I came to see his continuous comedy act as a desperate attempt to throw off the millstone that was around his neck. Even his generosity and philanthropy maybe only assuaged his hopelessness for a time. Bringing joy and laughter to others may have been his only solace…a pinprick of light in a vast darkness. But it was an exercise in futility. Robin’s beliefs about himself and who he is must have continued to weigh him down…all these years…until he had done all that he could think to do and was exhausted…unable to go on. I think many of us suffer through the same thing at differing severities. Most will not seriously contemplate suicide. Some will and a few will attempt it. Most will just suffer...weighed down by thoughts and emotions. It is profoundly sad. For me, the therapist again, it is made worse by the knowledge that suicide is pretty preventable. Not by me…I can’t do very much to stop someone from ending his or her life. But that person…he or she…can prevent it and I can usually help. But it takes work. It takes effective, empathetic therapy. It takes big changes…it takes small changes. It takes practice. It takes a village. One of the articles I read about him is that he may have very worried about money…it sounds absurd but not surprising…because anxiety is often not logical. Couple that with hopeless thoughts and it quickly becomes unbearable. But there is help. There is another way out. Friday I will share what I think may be the most important skill…or strategy for overcoming the depressive cycle…It is my go-to therapy tool for my clients and myself and I will share it with all of you. For yourselves…for others you know who are suffering… In the meantime, I, the person, the father, the fan, the wannabe comedian, and the therapist, mourn the loss of the funniest man in the world. #robinwilliams
Posted on: Wed, 13 Aug 2014 19:25:39 +0000
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