SHIFTING YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH FEAR Dr. Barbara De Angelis Whether you’ve thought about it this way or not, you have a relationship with fear, and it’s one of the most important relationships in your life! Imagine that you had a person in your life who followed you around twenty-four hours a day filling you with anxiety, destroying your confidence, and discouraging you from doing the things you really wanted to do. Every time you were about to make a change or take a risk, this person would say, “I wouldn’t do that if I were you. What if you fail? What if you get hurt? All kinds of bad things might happen if you go in that direction.” Imagine that before each conversation you had with friends, family or loved ones, this person would pull you aside and caution you: “If you open up, you might get rejected. Watch what you say! Don’t trust anyone!” Imagine that each time you considered taking action on any of your desires, personal or professional, this person would whisper: “You’ll be sorry if you do this. It’s going to turn out horribly. “ As you read this you may be thinking, “Well, I’d never tolerate someone like this in my life. I’d never put up with someone talking to me this way.” But the truth is, you probably already do--it’s your FEAR. Fear is like an emotional roommate that lives with you day and night. It talks to you, manipulates you, and tries to convince you to avoid doing or expressing anything that may cause you any kind of discomfort or involve any sort of risk. It says “You can’t...”, and “You shouldn’t”.... It eats away at your confidence and your self-esteem . It tells you not to act, not to reach out, not to try, not to trust, not to move. It steals life right out from under you. Take a moment and ask yourself these SOUL SHIFT QUESTIONS: What is my relationship with my fear? Do I let it dominate me? Do I let it talk me out of my dreams? Do I let it stop me from being the powerful person I want to be? Do I talk back to my fear up to a point, and then just fall apart and give in to its demands? Do I know how to stay focused on my goals in spite of the efforts my fear makes to pull me off track? Who is in control in this relationship most of the time, me or FEAR? Fear is one of your most powerful inner enemies. It is a force that can sabotage your happiness. How does fear do this? It keeps you stuck in whats not working. It prevents you from growing. It creates separation between you and other people. It talks you out of your dreams. It keeps you stagnant, frozen, unable to become all you were meant to be. Right now in your life, there are things you want to do that you’re not doing, changes you want to make that you’re not making, conversations you need to have that you’re not having, risks you want to take that you’re not taking. Maybe you’ve been longing to do some of these things for weeks, months, even years, but you end up procrastinating. What’s stopping you? YOUR FEAR. The secret for changing your relationship with fear isn’t to try and destroy it--it’s to make your courage, your true knowing, much bigger than your fear. It’s to make your dreams and your vision much bigger than your fear. It’s to make your love for yourself much bigger than your fear. Freedom doesn’t mean having no fear. It means acting in spite of your fear. You can do it! You’re more powerful than you think you are! I teach how to tap into your inner courage and use it to conquer fear in my new book Soul Shifts. Learn more here:amazon/Soul-Shifts-Transformative-Authentic-Spirituality/dp/1401944426
Posted on: Fri, 16 Jan 2015 22:27:02 +0000
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