SIXTEEN The day had finally arrived both households were running around making sure everything was in order. Raghu walked around the house although seen to be helping with the arrangements was lost in thought, he needed to speak to antara, needed to apologise for his outburst, but how. What was he going to say to her, and would anything he said justify his behavior. The engagement was low key affair with just a few friends and their respective families attending. Daya mai and Naani went over the last of the preparations; they wanted everything to be perfect. arnav, I cant believe you are missing this, how many times did I remind you? You never listen shruti was having a strong words with her husband arnav; he was away from home a lot on business. Im sorry you know I would never have missed the engagement deliberately the weather has been so bad I am hoping to board the next flight arnav was in vain trying to pacify his agitated wife, he was stuck in Singapore, due to heavy rain flights had been delayed for up to 24 hours. rukku hurry up or you will end up being late for your own engagement geeta shouted out. rukku finally came out of her room and immediately started to blush to seeing the reaction of her parents and antara. Ok stop staring lets go rukku said to her family who were all on the verge of developing pools of tears. Theyre here daya mai exclaimed, everyone gathered to welcome rukku and her family. Raghu stood further back away from them patiently waiting to see her. One by one everyone came in where is she he said to himself his eyes fixated on the door. Antara finally entered she was holding boxed gifts that were covering her up to her eyes. Raghu walked towards her to help her with the boxes conscious that she may drop them, after all balance wasnt one of antaras strong points. Before raghu could get to her Ram moved in to help her, as she placed the boxes down and turned she literally took his breath away. How anyone could be so beautiful, so angelic looking, she oozed purity, her innocence, her smile everything about her created madness, she made him react and feel things that were stranger than strange. She was wearing a white and baby pink saree, her hair was let lose which hung on one side her neck adorned a simple silver chain with a single diamant. Antara walked up to her family and as she did she stopped to see raghu looking at her...no not looking he was gawping at her. Shruti took rukku and antara around to introduce them to a few friends, engaged in polite conversation antara realised that raghu was walking in her direction still staring like there was no tomorrow, he started to make her feel uneasy. He came and stood with them as they were about to move on to the next group of friend raghu called out to antara in a low voice. Antara turned and looked at him blankly and after a few seconds of silence she turned around and walked of. Raghu could feel himself become frustrated but he knew he had to keep himself in check, he needed to talk to her, to apologise, and he couldnt let his anger get the better of him. It was time for the ceremony to begin machmach and rukku took their places on the stage that was purposely set up for them. Everyone gathered around to see the couple exchange rings, machmach and rukku looked at each other, they were totally in love. Everyone went up one by one to congratulate the couple antara looked on to her sister and machmach with tears of happiness streaming down. Not wanting to ruin her makeup she quickly moved towards the toilets to touch up any smudges she may have caused. Raghu did not miss her moving and felt this would be his chance to get her on her own. He picked up his pace and walked behind her as Antara opened the door to the toilet she felt a hand push her in making her jump as she turned to see who it was so she could whack them for being so rude she froze. Raghu had come in and locked the door behind him. Wh...what the hell do you think you are doing she said trying to move him out the way. Raghu grabbed her hand and pulled her back away from the door. I need to talk to you antara he said with sincerity antara looked up at him she was so angry you want to talk to me...here in the toilet? Have you lost your bloody mind? antara tried to release her hand from his grasp but the more she tried the tighter it got. antara I am not letting you go until you have heard what I have to say antara yanked her hand out of his and stepped back what more is there left to say raghu, there is nothing left, I dont want to hear or listen to anything you have to say, ju...just get out of my way antara tried to move forward but raghu had blocked her in with his hands leaning against the wall on both sides. His face was inches away from hers, his eyes started to narrow, he wanted to talk to her but she wasnt making it easy for him, he tried to keep his voice steady as he spoke. I am not letting you leave until I have said what I need to his voice had started to soften she could feel his warm breath on her skin sending a tingling feeling down her spine, she continued to look into his eyes what she blurted a little more aggressively then she had intended. Raghu took in a deep sigh and relaxed his hands withdrawing them to free her. I didnt know antara, if I had known I would never had said what I did, I would never behaved the way I did antara looked at him trying to understand what he was saying he took in another deep breath before he continue shruti told me about yo..your parents...I honestly didnt know...wh...what I am trying to say is that...is that antara could not bring himself to say sorry he let his head fall not being able to hold her gaze. Antara had figured out what it is he was trying to do, she was still upset with him she was still angry. If you have finished can I go now antara said coldly raghu quickly looked up at her a little confused by her tone. Antara moved forward to unlock the door Im sorry antara stopped pulling her hand away from the lock, she almost lost her balance as she shot a look back to raghu Im really sorry antara I never meant to hurt you, if I had known about your parents I would never have said that to you antara went numb she couldnt believe raghu actually apologised, her eyes started to moisten and tears threatened to escape, she held them back as much as she could. She had never seen him like this before his face was so soft, his eyes looked at her with an intensity she did not recognise, his whole body started to relax. All of a sudden she saw him hold out his hand she looked down to see his extended hand in front of her she wasnt sure what he wanted her to do. Her heart had really started to pound and she could feel her stomach summersault not giving her brain a chance to register anything she lifted her hand and placed it in his. They both looked down to see their hands and fingers entwine and up again to meet each others gaze. What was happening? Neither of them knew. After a few minutes which felt like forever antara broke the silence We should get back raghu nodded and unlocked the door they both exited the toilet not realising they were still holding hands. It wasnt until Ram came up to them that antara quickly pulled her hand back and without giving any further eye contact she went back to be with her family. One by one everyone started to leave it was soon going to be time for antara to be going too. shruti invited the rukkus family to come round for dinner the next week so they could discuss dates for the wedding. shruti, I wont be here, I am starting at the Academy next week and as part of our induction we are going to Shimla for a week antara said looking at geeta for support. Oh no, we will miss you shruti said pulling antara into a tight hug when are you leaving um...I start on Monday but we dont leave until Wednesday whilst antara was talking to shruti about her travel plans raghu stood there as if someone had jolted the life out of him. Why was he feeling so sad its not as if he was going to see her everyday anyway so her leaving shouldnt have made a difference to him but it did. machmach your mum has given us so many things how we all going to fit into the car rukku said looking down at the millions of bags and boxed gifts. Its ok rukku, raghu can take one car and machmach can take the other shruti said as she looked at raghu who nodded in agreement. antara you can bring the bags and other items with raghu antara shot up a glance at her mother then looked at raghu who seemed to be mirroring her expression. Raghu knew that if antara was leaving this was the only opportunity he would have to spend any time alone with her. Once the car was loaded antara sat in the passenger seat and turned away from raghu looking out the window, after their encounter in the toilet she didnt know what to say to him, he never ceased to amaze her, his forever changing demeanor was starting to give her some serious whiplash. Raghu tried to break the silence but he didnt know what to say either. Raghu cleared his throat and took in a deep breath so are you looking forward to starting your course? antara tilted her head slightly yes and then turned back again. raghus grip tightened over the wheel clam down raghu he said to himself trying to contain his frustration. Why didnt you tell me? I mean you never mentioned the Art Academy, it was the reason you resigned...you could have told me antara turned around to face him properly she looked down mentally collating a response, she slowly looked back up to raghu I didnt feel I needed to tell you as it had nothing to do with my work life, and on top of that you never really made it easy for me to talk to you, its not as if we had a healthy work relationship raghu stepped on the breaks forcing the car to stop making antara jolt forward. Antara gulped and looked at him in utter shock. Raghu looked straight ahead she could see his face tense up OMG...he is going to blow she thought to herself. ra...raghu what happened, why did you stop? she managed to whisper. Raghu looked at her with his eyes darkening by the second, he knew there was truth in what she had said, he hadnt made her life easy and she didnt have to tell him anything about her private life but it wasnt something he wanted to hear. Raghu didnt reply he carried on glaring at her making her feel uncomfortable he put the car into gear and skidded off again making antara jump. By the time they had reached antaras apartment the rest of the family had already gone in.antara called rukku and asked her to come down to help with the bags raghu, please come in rukku said taking the bags from his hand No, I have to be getting back but thank you for the invitation maybe some other time. As he was about to walk off he turned to look at antara who was struggling picking up some of the boxes he walked up to her and helped her balance them on her arm as soon as he did he walked off giving her no time to respond or thank him. She took a deep sigh I will never be able to figure that monster out. SEVENTEEN Raghu was only too aware that Antara would be leaving to go to Shimla tomorrow; he couldnt stop thinking about it. Why does it bother me so much, its not as if I see her every day, so what raghu, get a grip of yourself, if she is going let her why are you so bothered? raghu was furiously talking to himself as he got ready to leave for work. Antara had already started at the Academy and loved every minute. She had all her bags packed and was ready to leave. rukku and machmach were going to drop her off to the coach stand where all her fellow students were due to assemble. The coach was going to be leaving at 10.00am. Raghu finished whatever breakfast he could manage; he stood up and called for machmach. Ayaan, we need to make a move, Ill take my car he said as he put his jacket on. raghu, you go ahead Ill join you later me and rukku are going to drop antara off to the coach stand. Raghus face didnt give much a way but he felt like he couldnt breathe, he felt a touch of jealousy that machmach would be seeing antara before she left. The touch of jealousy soon turned into frustration and then into anger fine he retorted and walked off. As they reached the coach stand antara started to become nervous, she was excited and couldnt wait to experience the week ahead but for the first time since her parents passed away she was going to be away from rukku. Antara stop fidgeting, and quit jumping up and down you look like a wind up puppet rukku said trying to get antara to calm down, antara gave rukku a ha ha not funny look. Antara saw a few familiar faces that had started to arrive with their loved ones, she hadnt made any real friends yet, after all it had only been two days. She casually smiled to acknowledge some of her colleagues. mach mach, thank you for dropping me off machmach walked up to antara and gave her a big hug no worries antara, anything for my little sis as soon as he said that antara looked up to him, his eyes were so warm and so sincere, she could feel tears sting her eyes and before she knew it a droplet had escaped. Hey what happened, its only a week, dont worry I will make sure I look after rukku he said rubbing her back. No...no its not that, its just you called me sis, after mum and dad, rukku and her parents are the only family I have ever known, and today because of her I have a brother...I ...I antara couldnt finish her sentence but machmach knew what she was trying to say. He cupped her face and wiped her tears away with his thumbs. Its ok antara, you are very lucky that you have so many people around you that love you and care for you. No matter where you are or what you decide to do we will always be with you and with that he placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. Rukku was in the back ground becoming all emotional seeing the two most precious people in her life bonding. Antara saw her lecturer and another member of staff arrive, soon enough they started to gather all the students together to board the coach. machmach went to load her suitcase into the luggage compartment while antara said bye to rukku. I am going to miss you so much rukku I doubt it antara, you will be having too much fun to be missing anyone, and hey what are these for she said waving her mobile. antara gave both of them one last hug before she turned around and boarded the coach. The journey was a very long one; antara was sat next to Sara, one of the first people she had met on her first day. The journey had started of slow hardly anyone was interacting but a few hours in and the coach was engulfed with constant chatter, laughing and music. Students started to get up and change seats to get to know other students; the journey was so long they had enough time to become acquainted. Night had started to fall antara who was now sitting next to Sahil started to yawn I have that effect on people Sahil said with a smirk antara started laughing Im sorry, I guess the day is catching up with me, I think I will head back to my seat and nod off for a bit antara stood up to return to her seat, before she walked off she turned around Thanks Sahil, it was nice talking to you. Antara started stirring in her sleep with the sounds of quiet whispers from around her, as she opened her eyes she saw the first rays of the sun shine through, she pulled back the curtain and saw the mountains of Shimla, the view was magnificent, it took her breath away literally she was in awe of mother natures true beauty. After the longest journey and very sore bums they had finally reached their destination. They were staying at a lodge situated in a valley, which was surrounded by everything green; there was a beautiful stream that ran through the middle with crisp clear water. The lodge was purpose built and formed part of an extension to the main campus back in Delhi. Everyone had to share rooms, antara buddied up with Sara. Once they had settled in they were asked to meet in the lobby so that they could be given specific instruction to what they would be doing for the week ahead. They had a few ground rules like respecting the environment and surroundings they were living in, everyone was to go out in twos keeping personal safety in mind and no one was allowed out after 10. Back at RNN Designs raghu was having a hard time trying to convince himself that antara didnt mean anything to him and he had no business thinking about her. But the truth of the matter was that she did mean something to him something that he wasnt able to give a name to or understand. With every moment that passed the need to see her to talk to her grew. He needed answers, he needed to know what was pulling him so forcefully towards her, how is it that he is attracted to someone he has over and over again tried to hate. Not being able to take anymore he had decided, he was going to Shimla to see her he needed to put an end to this. He called the Art Academy to enquire where they were staying he picked up his jacket and laptop and walked downstairs, not being able to find machmach he went up to Aman Aman I am going on leave for a few days I need you and machmach to hold the fort for me without giving Aman a chance to respond or even time to register what he had just said raghu walked out of the office. EIGHTEEN Raghu had taken the first available flight he had booked a hotel in the same valley not far from where antara was staying. As the plane prepared to land raghu took in a deep sigh he had taken the plunge but did he really know what he was doing? Raghu checked in and enquired about the Academy Lodge, the receptionist informed him that it was a ten minute drive. Raghu went back to his room, he stared out the window and slowly tried to work out what it was that he was going to say to her, how was he going to explain his presence here. Not being able to come up with anything constructive he threw a punch to the wall Why am I thinking so much, I dont need an explanation Im Raghunath Naik with that he picked up his coat and walked out. Antara was sitting with Sara and Sahil by the stream the trio had become quite close in the space of a very short time, they were sitting out sketching, enjoying the view and making small talk as they worked on their first assignment. Raghu entered the lodge and asked the first worker he saw about antara. The worker didnt know who he was talking about but informed him that the class had walked down to the stream. Raghu made his way down as he did he did not fail to notice the beauty of his surroundings, it was serene all he could hear was the rustling of the water flowing and a few birds chirping nearby. A vast contrast to the noise and sounds he was used to living in Delhi. Somehow he found himself at peace his heart rate had slowed down beating at normal rate his levels of irritation had calmed - but not for long. As he approached the stream he saw different groups of pupils all with their heads engrossed into their drawings. He looked around scanning every corner and every face but she was nowhere to be seen Where are you antara he said to himself, as he walked closer he heard a scream followed by laughter he turned to see antara trying to dodge Sahil splashing water on her stop it Sahil, the water is freezing Sahil was having too much fun watching antara running around to want to stop. Raghu didnt like what he saw, his eyes narrowed turning red with anger, his hand almost turning white with how tightly he had held his fist. He had never seen antara in this avatar, she was laughing, looked care free, she just looked happy - but who was this boy and how dare he. raghu didnt move he was frozen, his mind was in over drive - he closed his eyes and loosened his fist - What are you doing raghu, you need to go back he said to himself he felt a dullness overtake him. As he was about to turn around he was hit by a body that made him fall back. She was holding on to him like her life depended on it, lying on top of him with her eyes closed, she tried to catch her breath. She had been trying to get away from Sahil when she ran into him. At this point neither antara nor raghu knew who the other person was, Antara had her head buried in his chest. As soon as raghu realised that he was holding on to her he slowly pulled his hands apart and held her by the shoulders to lift her up. Antara opened her eyes to say she was shocked would have been an understatement. antaras eyes were fixated she couldnt believe it was him, it was actually him. Her head started spinning with a million questions, how, why, when. Raghu continued to look at her and could have held his gaze forever, she looked beautiful, it didnt matter what she wore or what time of day it was, she looked perfect. Antara are you ok a voice screamed out from behind her breaking their trance. Antara quickly got up and looked behind her Sahil had now caught up with her and stood beside her. I am so sorry, are you ok? he said with a mischievous laugh. By this time raghu had stood up he looked at antara then at this boy who was irritating him beyond anything he could think of. Antara was lost for words she kept looking at raghu, was he really here? Sorry. antara has a habit of falling Sahil said trying not to laugh, in the short time he had known her antara must had tripped or fell at least a dozen times. Raghu gave him a look that spoke a thousand words, a thousand unpleasant words. antara felt the heat of raghus anger radiate off him she quickly looked at Sahil Sahil, this is..um this is what was she supposed to say she didnt know how to address him this is raghu, he is a...a fr... friend from Delhi raghu quickly looked at her being unable to believe what she just said, did she just introduced him as her friend, he was far from it. It made him smile inside his face began to relax of all unpleasant emotions. Antara excused herself and gestured raghu to walk with her. They both walked in total silence, before long they were standing outside the lodge. Antara reluctantly turned towards him his soft eyes scanned her face he could see the hesitation so decided to break the silence. Im staying at the Holiday Inn, which is a ten minute drive further up the valley, if you can...I mean would it be possible to meet with you later today antaras eyes began to widen she couldnt bring herself to answer so she just nodded raghu sighed with relief not realising that he was holding his breath. ok, can I pick you up around seven? antara again nodded and looked to the ground not being able to hold his gaze any longer. Raghu gently extended his hand and lifted her chin up sending a tingling sensation through her body almost causing her to shiver antara are you ok? he asked with genuine concern. Antara raised her hand to pull his away from her chin Im fine..its just that...um...raghu what are you doing here? she had managed to finally speak but at the same time her heart started to race. Raghu didnt answer her question Ill see you tonight he said with a smile. As he turned around to walk away he felt a pull, he hadnt realised that antara was still holding his hand. antara quickly dropped his hand and started to blush. Ill see you later she quickly said and ran into the lodge towards her room. Antara didnt return to join the rest of her class she spent the next three hours having a mental breakdown. She couldnt understand why he was here, what was he doing here, why did he want to meet her, had he come here especially for her...Ok antara stop being stupid, why would he come here especially for you, there has to be some logical explanation she rambled on to herself whilst pacing her room. Sara and Sahil had returned where were you, I thought you would come back Sara said passing her sketch pad and pencil case to her Sorry, I got a little caught up. Ok get ready were all going out for dinner today, Mr Mohan (lecturer) has arranged for us to have dinner at one of the restaurants further up the Valley antaras heart skipped a beat, how could she go, what was she going to say to her lecturer and colleagues. Antara, hurry up we havent got long we are all meeting in the lobby at 7. Antara got ready, she wasnt sure of what to do; she didnt have raghus number to tell him that she couldnt meet him. She wanted to meet him she needed to know what was going on. But on the other hand she didnt have reason to say no to the dinner arranged by her lecturer, well not one she could openly share. Antara quickly wrote a note and handed it to the receptionist asking her to give it to Mr Raghuath Naik. Antara walked up to the rest of her class, everyone was really excited about dinner, going up the valley and being able to take in the night life was going to be a real treat for them. With Sara and Sahil walking on either side of her antara relaxed herself knowing that by having left the note she wasnt leaving raghu in the lurch and he would understand. It was coming up to quarter past seven and there was still no sign of antara, raghu was starting to lose patience come on antara, how much longer do I need to wait? he said to himself. He walked up to the reception area and asked for Antara. The receptionist explained that the students had gone out for the evening and that there was no one here. Raghu banged his fist against the counter is shear anger; he turned around and walked off. The receptionist called after him waving the note but raghu did not stop to look. He banged the door behind him and threw his jacket across the bed who the hell does she think she is, how dare she...a simple message to say I am not coming would not have gone amiss raghu was more than angry, he was angry that she had stood him up, he was angry with himself he made himself look like a fool, for a girl. Why was he giving her importance, why did he feel he needed to trek across the country just so he could see her? She must be laughing, enjoying herself with that buffoon. Raghu had convinced himself that antara had done this deliberately and there was no way he was going to allow her to make him feel the way he did, she was going to get to know exactly what he thought even if it was the last thing he did. The next day antara made sure she finished her morning class and session with her group, she quickly picked up her bag and ran towards Garden Hill, she had asked raghu to meet her there for half one. Little did she realise that raghu had not picked up the note. It was coming up to half 4 and still there was no sign of him maybe he is angry that I didnt meet him last night, maybe he got caught up with a meeting after all he must be here on business antara went round and round in her head trying to come up with plausible reasons for raghu not coming. It was now six and the sun had started to set, antara picked up her bag and made her way back to the lodge she had to admit she felt disappointed almost heartbroken she had been looking forward to seeing him. As she reached the lodge and was about to walk in she felt a tight grip on her arm making her jump. Raghu swung her around forcing her to crash into him. Antaras heart started to pound she looked up at him totally taken aback even though it was dark she could see the expression in his eyes. He tightened his grip on her arm and forcibly pulled her away from the lodge towards the stream. Antara struggled trying to get him to let go but it was no use the more she tried the tighter his grip became the pain was becoming unbearable raghu stop, please youre hurting me...where are you taking me her pleading fell on deaf ears. Raghu finally stopped, swinging her in front of him letting go of her arm, she struggled to keep her balance. She held her arm where he had gripped her so hard and tried to soothe away the pain. What do you think of yourself Antara kaul, do you know how long I waited for you, do you know how stupid I looked, how foolish I felt waiting for someone that was never going to show raghus voice became louder and louder. Antara tried to speak I havent finished yet he held his hand out to her and cut her off before she had even begun. You think just because I asked to meet with you, you can treat me like this do you forget who I am he said gritting his teeth. Youre nothing...do you hear me nothing but an immoral girl, who has no respect for her culture or practices...someone who thinks she can flaunt her beauty and have rich men succumb to her, you make me sick with that he pushed past antara and walked off leaving her in utter shock, she was finding it hard to comprehend what she just heard. Her eyes over flowed with tears the cold air from around stung her face his words kept spinning around in her head she couldnt understand why he behaved like that, what did she do to deserve any of this? Not being able to withhold herself any longer antara fell to the ground and cried out loud. She didnt know how long she had been there hours before she mustered up the energy to get up and walk back to the lodge. She knew it was late as everyone had retired to their room, Antara crept in slowly she didnt want to wake Sara up as she would not be able to explain her present state luckily for her Sara was fast asleep, she quickly went to the bathroom and washed her face and went to bed. NINETEEN Raghu had started to pack his bags; his temper had not subsided in the slightest. As he put the last of his things together he heard a knock at the door. A porter stood there with an envelope, Mr naik, my wife works at the Academy Lodge, she told me that you visited there yesterday, you left abruptly and she was unable to give you this raghu looked onto him not really understanding what he was saying he took the envelope and closed the door. He sat on his bed and opened the envelope inside was a note: Dear raghu I am really really really sorry I wont be able to meet with you today, I would have called but I dont have your mobile number. Our class is being taken out for dinner and I couldnt back out. I feel really bad as you will be getting this message last minute. But promise I will make it up to you. I am not sure how long you are here for, if you are around tomorrow I will meet you at Garden Hill at half one, there is a small cafeteria nearby we can have lunch together and catch up. I am all too intrigued to find out what you are doing here. Even though I was shocked to see you I have to admit it was a nice shock, seeing someone familiar in a new place amongst new people is always nice. I hope you are not upset and do decide to come. Sorry once again Antara Ps this is my mobile number just in case 0934625178 Raghu felt like someone had pulled out his heart through his throat and trampled all over it. It was like someone had knocked him so hard that he lost all feeling and senses. How could he have been so cold, so shallow, and so monstrous towards her? It was like he was possessed he didnt want to lash out but when he was there in the moment he couldnt control himself. Raghus whole body was consumed by guilt and regret. This time even he knew he had gone too far there was nothing he would be able to say or that would ever change how much hurt and pain he had inflicted on her. His whole purpose of coming her was to see her to talk to her to help himself understand what was going on with him what was it that he was feeling. Antaras face flashed before him he saw the pain in fear in her face that made him scream, he hated himself for not being able to control his impulses he remembered seeing her by the stream laughing being happy and then what he had done to her not so many hours ago. He knew he should have never of come. Antara woke up looking like death warmed over she had missed breakfast and kept herself isolated from the rest of the group. Sara and Sahil started to worry, they had tried to talk to her but she wasnt giving much away. When Antara missed lunch Sara and Sahil decided to talk to Mr Mohan. antara are you ok, a number of you colleagues are worried, and you havent been eating and seem distant? Mr Mohan asked I...I am fine sir just a little homesick thats all antara tried to be as convincing as she could. Mr Mohan put his hand over her shoulder I can understand but we will be leaving the day after tomorrow antara smiled and then threw her head back into her work. Antara tried to put on a brave face for the remaining part of her trip she laughed and joked with her new found friends and colleagues however much she put up the pretense the pain and hurt seeped through she had lost the sparkle. As the coach finally reached Delhi everyone was in a rush to get out to see their awaiting families. Antara jumped off the coach and started to look around antara she heard rukkus voice scream out she could see her running towards her through the crowd. Antara pushed past everyone and ran into her sisters open arms she was so happy to see her oh antara, thank god you are back, do you even know how much I missed you? I am missed you too rukku. rukku automatically sensed there was something wrong by hearing her voice. She pulled antara back hey, you ok? Whats wrong antara? Nothing rukku I am just tired from the journey rukku knew it was more than that but didnt push her. Come,mum and dad are waiting in the car. Naani I am really worried about raghu, since his return from this mystery trip he has totally withdrawn, you know he hasnt been going to work, he hardly comes down and when I try and talk to him he brushes me off, whats wrong with him shruti was becoming seriously worried about her brothers behavior, nothing seemed to make sense, he didnt tell his family where he was going before he left and when he came back he refused to answer any questions. Shruti, let him be the more you pursue him the more he will withdraw, I am sure he will come and talk to you when he is ready to Naani said trying to reassure her granddaughter. Raghu made an appearance at breakfast he looked so unkempt which was totally out of character. He had not shaven for days and his hair fell over his face. raghu I need you to come to the office today, we have a number of new clients coming in, and you know the Delhi Fashion Roadshow is coming up I cant make all the decisions without your approval machmach looked raghu hoping this would get him to think about work and come in. Raghu nodded Ill pop in this afternoon machmach smiled Great Ill see you then. As machmach got up to leave he remembered his conversation with rukku last night mum I was thinking of going out shopping with rukku for the wedding, now that antara is back we can get pretty much all we need raghu shot his head up as soon as he heard antara - shes back! Raghu ran to his room - he paced up and down thinking of what to do. She was back and he had to meet her to apologise to say how sorry he was. He picked up the note and re read it for the umpteenth time, since he had returned he had typed a hundred messages all saved in his draft item he couldnt pluck up the courage to send any of the texts. It was fruitless sitting here he needed to pull himself together and take the first step. Raghu arrived at RNN Designs and started making up for the work that he had been neglecting for so many days. Machmach came to see him in his cabin, hey raghu, its good to see you back man he said with a smile raghu reciprocated his brothers smile and warm welcome um I was going to head of early hope thats ok? Yeah sure, no need to ask, where you off to? Im meeting rukku and antara for a shopping spree, there isnt much time left and there is so much we need to get organised machmach looked at raghu who was lost in thought raghu, are you ok? raghu shook his head to bring himself back to the present yeah...yes Im totally fine...um machmach do you mind if I tag along I can pick up a few things for myself too, and knowing shrutis luck arnav wont get her until the last day so I can pick him up a suit for him machmach was more than happy to have raghu come along of course, the more the merrier, Ill come and get you around 4. raghu sat down his heart started to pick up beat he was going to see her he chuckled to himself man why do I feel like a love struck teenager as soon as the words escaped his mouth it hit him he repeated the last few words love struck, his face tensed up he wasnt able to understand what had he just said was it love? Did he actually love antara? How could he know, for someone who has never been in love, never believed in the concept or such relationships how could he possibly know that he was in love with her. Since he had named his restlessness, his attraction, the force that pulls him towards her, the concern and sadness he felt when she was hurt or cried love he wasnt able to concentrate his emotions were spiraling out of control, four oclock could not come fast enough. Antara and rukku arrived at the mall before time they were waiting for machmach outside. antara what time is it? Chill rukku, they are not late we are early antara said rolling her eyes at rukku who hated waiting and was becoming irritated. There he is...finally rukku exclaimed pointing to a white SUV that just pulled up in the car park. antara didnt pay much attention; she was busy texting Sahil to notice that raghu was also here. Raghu inhaled a deep breath as he walked up to her, Antara was so engrossed in her phone she totally missed machmach greeting her, rukku nudged antara antara, we are ready, put that awayantara switched her phone off Im so sorr... she looked up and froze she saw raghu standing behind machmach her eyes widened, her heart started pounding and her mouth dried up instantly. antara you ok, you look like youve just seen a ghost machmach joked umm...no Im fine she said quickly looking away. Raghu didnt miss her expressions he knew that she was far from happy to see him he also didnt miss how weak she looked, her eyes had dark circles, she looked like she had lost a lot of weight and the glow - she wasnt glowing as she always did. Raghu knew very well that he was responsible for her present state he tightened his fist and mentally kicked himself. Rukku linked arms with machmach and started to make her way in to the mall leaving antara and raghu still standing, Antara tried to move but couldnt she kept looking at raghu from the corner of her eyes and at the same time he couldnt stop staring at her. antara..raghu you guys planning to come or not? machmach shouted realising that they were not behind them. antara walked up to machmach almost sprinting across the entrance leaving raghu following behind in slow footsteps. Antara couldnt think straight this was so awkward, she kept a good distance between herself and raghu but was aware of his gaze, she could feel her skin burning. Rukku was so excited she was trying on suit after suit and antara was no help at all, she just kept smiling and saying yes to everything. What is he doing here, who invited him? antara who was at first feeling anxious and scared was now getting angry. Raghu tried to approach her but couldnt move his feet, he himself was becoming irked this is stupid, all you have to do is go up to her and say sorry he said to himself. As soon as he saw antara standing on her own he forced himself to walk up to her, as he approached her he saw antara take out her phone and walk off. Antara could sense him coming towards her and immediately took out her phone and pretended to answer a call walking away from him. She stood a short distance away and looked at him through they clothes railing he looked annoyed his posture stood tall and she knew all too well that when he stood stiff he was becoming angry. I need to get out of here she said to herself she quickly went looking for rukku if she didnt get away from him now she was going to explode. rukku I need to go she said trying to hide her panic whats wrong antara? Are you ok rukku held antara by her shoulder she was becoming concerned. yes...um I mean no..rukku I dont feel too good can I please just go home she looked at rukku with pleading eyes. Of course you can, come we will drop you off no rukku please dont spoil your trip because of me I will be fine I can get a taxi rukku was about to say yes when they heard a voice come from behind Ill drop you off it was raghu, Antara gulped she looked at rukku who was all but too happy with raghus gesture No she screamed making a few heads turn quickly realising her tone she softened it no...it..its ok I can go by myself she said not giving him any eye contact. Dont be silly antara, if you are not feeling well then let raghu take you, he can come and pick us up later rukku said ushering her towards him. Antara didnt know how to protest any further she felt like her heart was going to stop beating she didnt want to be anywhere near this monster. Had he not caused her enough pain had he not insulted her enough? She cursed the day she every set eyes on him, she cursed herself for ever feeling any attraction for him. Before she knew it she was standing next to him rukku had pushed her all the way she had no choice but to follow him to the car. Antara quietly followed him to the car as he walked round to the passenger side he opened the door. She looked at him then lowered her gaze not moving antara he managed to whisper antara looked up and he gestured her to get into the car No...I dont need to be dropped, I am more than capable of going by myself she retorted in a cold harsh voice. Raghu was taken aback he felt himself heating up but knew he needed to stop it. antara, please just get in, what will rukku say? Do you want me to go back in and tell her? he said smirking inwardly knowing that antara would never let rukku come to know. She threw raghu a glare that was no less than a few obscene swear words she huffed past him and sat in the car. Raghu smiled a little blackmail always does the trick. TWENTY Antara deliberately sat with her back towards raghu and quickly occupied herself with the hustle and bustle of the passing city roads. Raghu consciously drove slower to ensure the journey would take that much longer. He kept glancing at her trying to say something but she wasnt making it any easier for him with her back turned. All of a sudden raghu pulled up into a side road. antara turned and started to look around where are we? Why have you stopped she said in a slight panicked voice. antara ..I ...I need to talk to you, there are things that I need to say antara didnt let him finish she raised her hand to stop him there is nothing to talk about and there is nothing you can say that is worth me listening to, now if you dont mind I would like to go home raghu was left a little stunned, he had never seen this side of antara. Antara looked straight ahead but she could feel raghu becoming irate antara you are not going anywhere until I have said what I need to say he said although his voice was steady you could tell that it had started to shake. Antara turned her whole body to face him Why, Why Mr Raghunath Naik , what more could you possibly say that I would want to listen to? Did you not satisfy your cold demonic heart the last time you spoke to me or was drawing the line at immoral middle class girl too short for you antara was burning red with anger she was trying not to let the tears that stung her eyes escape and was trying even harder not to falter under this false pretence. Antara was not an angry person or someone who expressed anger especially not in this way. Every word antara spoke felt like daggers puncturing his heart his stomach felt like it was summersaulting he didnt know what to say to her he kept his eyed locked with hers, they sat there without moving without talking and almost like they had stopped breathing. Their moment was abruptly broken by the ring of antaras phone, antara cleared her throat before she answered it Hi Sara, yes Im fine...um tonight? It should be ok what time will you come? Ok I will ask Sahil to pick me up at eight. Ok take care bye antara put her phone away brushing her hair back with her fingers she took in a deep sigh. I need to get home, so please if you can drop me off, and if not then I can go from here not waiting for his response antara moved and was about to open the door when she felt his hand on her shoulder she quickly shot a look back at him making him retract his hand immediately its not an easy walk from here and you might not be able to get a taxi back, stay Ill drop you raghu started the car and pulled back out on to the main road, his face was expressionless but only he knew of the whirlpool that was forming within him. The rest of the journey was filled with silence raghu pulled up outside her apartment, antara got out the car and left without saying anything she didnt even glance back. Raghu felt defeated he was hurt and upset, emotions he had not experienced before well not since his parents passed away. He remembered that antara was going out with her friends and that Sahil guy was coming to pick her up his hands automatically started to tighten around the steering wheel, the thought of antara with someone else was not something he was comfortable with. mummy, rukku just texted she said she is going back home with machmach and he will drop her off after dinner antara shouted to her mum as she was getting ready to go out. After todays events antara was glad that her little gang had planned a night out she welcomed the distraction. Machmach and rukku had reached home and were excitedly showing of their shopping. Raghu came down from his room raghu, thank you for today rukku said No worries, sorry I had to send the driver to pick you up, something came up last minute No problem, hope antara is ok, she didnt look too well rukku said as she started to fold the lose items of clothing. I am sure she is fine, she is going out with her friends this evening Oh yes, antara messaged me saying she was going out to Pasta Italiano - I tell you antara and her food rukku said laughing at the thought of her sisters obsession with food especially pizza. Raghus face lit up Pasta Italiano...you can run but you cant hide Miss kaul ... You will listen to what I have to say he thought to himself and with that he picked up his jacket and keys and left before anyone noticed. Raghu sat in the corner of the restaurant making sure he was not in clear view. He had been waiting for around fifteen minutes, for someone who had zero patience and didnt like to wait he was surprisingly quite calm. As he waited he looked through the number of messages he had composed but could never bring himself to sending them. His quiet moment was interrupted by the sounds of laughter he looked up and saw antara and her friends come in, luckily they were seated towards the front of the restaurant. Like always antara took his breath away she wore a plain royal blue dress which came off her shoulders adorned by a silver belt that hugged her tiny waist and plain silver drop earrings. She was always dressed simply, modestly but never failed to look like a million dollars. It wasnt long before raghu noticed Sahil he had managed to seat himself next to her and left no opportunity to casually touch her and in one instance hug her from the side. Raghu felt like his eyes were going to explode he hated this guy; he hated how close he was to antara. Raghu patiently observed antara with her friends, she was so happy, having so much fun he could already see her glowing as she always did. He sat back and admired the way she ate and drank, something he had never really seen her do, when she laughed her nose scrunched up she looked so cute, innocent like a child. After a few moments he saw Sahil lean in to antara to whisper something in her ear all of a sudden antaras body stiffened her expressions fell it looked like she had almost stopped breathing. antara slowly turned her head around and saw him. Their eyes locked, she was in utter shock she couldnt believe he was here. Now that she had seen him raghu got up from his seat and started to walk towards her she could feel herself hyperventilate she held on to the edge of the table trying to find some kind of support. She never let go of his gaze until he came and stood right next to her. Hi, um is it ok if I have a quick word with you that is if your friends dont mind raghu said giving everyone a quick glance. To say that antara was a little dumbfounded would have been an understatement why is it that everywhere I go he is there, I cant get away from him, and what the hell is he doing here anyway? she thought to herself antara I wont take long raghu said breaking her chain of thought antara go, its ok we will wait for you Sara said smiling at the handsome man that stood between her and antara. Antara got up still holding the side of the table for support she could feel her legs give way as she took the first step she stumbled only to be caught by raghu, she could have died of embarrassment she quickly pulled herself off of his arm and started to fidget with her fingers waiting for him to lead the way. Raghu pulled out the chair for her and she sat down unwillingly this is the last place she wanted to be. raghu sat down opposite her and cleared his throat can I get you a drink? he casually asked her antara looked at him totally lost no thank you I have one waiting for me with my friends...raghu why are you here? What is it you want from me? raghu hadnt really prepared himself for the direct questioning. He took a sip of his water and inhaled a deep breath I wanted to talk to you antara antara was about to say something to challenge him most probably but he stopped her Please let me finish what I have to say fine she said folding her arms Im listening. It was now or never raghu had never really had to have a conversation like this he wasnt someone who engaged in long discussions unless it was a business meeting. This wasnt easy for him it was far from it this involved him being real being truthful about what he was feeling, even though he wasnt totally sure what the feelings were he needed to make sure that what he was about to say was perfect. antara Im s...Im sorry I really and truly am sorry antara gave him an expressionless glare did he just say sorry, great he is sorry, and what it is going to make everything go away...why are you sorry...I really couldnt care less antara started to ramble on not realising that raghu could actually hear her. Raghu noticed her eyes wondering around antara please you are not making this easy for me, can you...just look at me there are things I need to say and I need you to listen to antaras eyes widened a little the expressionless face she carried relaxed and became softer, she couldnt help it he sounded so sincere so humble in his request. Antara nodded allowing him to continue and this time she sat up and looked straight at him. antara...I ...I dont understand what is going on, I mean going on in my head. I know I have treated you unfairly...ok not only unfairly...In plain words damn right out of order. When I heard you were leaving to go to Shimla I felt like I was losing a part of me and for some strange reason I wanted to stop you, I knew I couldnt so came to see you. I didnt get youre note antara, when I came to meet you I waited for so long giving myself every excuse and reason to wait that much longer. And when I realized you were not going to come I totally lost it. I thought you did it deliberately to get back at me for the way I had treated you. When I saw you the next day I couldnt control myself and I lashed out. It was only when I got back to the hotel that I received your note. I cant tell you antara how bad I felt how I kicked myself for saying what I did...I...didnt mean it. Since I got back I typed a hundred text messages to send you but never could find myself strong enough...antara... raghu stopped antaras eyes were red she was crying nonstop the tears just kept flowing raghus heart sank he quickly reached out across the table to hold her hand antara please dont cry I didnt meant to hurt you, I didnt mean to upset you, I am so sorry...please antara Raghu lowered his gaze he felt defeated once again. Antara was crying but it wasnt all because she had been so hurt but because she couldnt believe what he was saying, every word seemed to give her a sense of relief, she believed every word that he spoke and every emotion that came with them. Antara drew back her hand and wiped her tears. She didnt know what to say she slowly stood up as raghu realised he quickly got up and stood in front of her. antara please dont leave, at least say something...anything antara looked up to meet his gaze she could see the pain and regret he held, she could see the pleas raghu, I cant do this...not now I have come with my friends they are waiting for me, I need to go as she was about to walk off raghu grabbed her arm if not now then when antara, I just need to know that you are ok, that we are ok antara looked up him what does he mean we...there is no we she thought. She didnt know what to say to him her mind was boggling you have my number, call me and with that she walked past him to go back towards her friends. Hey you ok, you look like you have been crying...what happened antara...what did that guy do? Sahils questions were never ending all her friends took it in turns to ask her what was wrong. Just then Sahil got up this friend of yours has some explaining to do antara quickly grabbed his arm the last thing she wanted was for Sahil to approach or confront raghu. I am fine Sahil, chill its nothing serious just having spoken to him bought back a few memories she tried to convince him. He is the same guy who came to Shimla isnt he? Who is he antara how do you know him? Sara asked, antara smiled as convincingly as she could Oh he is rukkus brother in law to be and I worked with him for a short while...its a long story come lets go with that everyone started to collect their belongings and walked out. Antara turned one last time to see raghu had not moved from his position, he was still looking at her with such intensity, she almost felt bad for not being able to talk to him. It was 11.30, antara was lying in bed going over what had happened, she still found it hard to believe that raghu had let down his guard so much that he was able to talk to her tell her he was so sorry and how he felt, this was not the Raghunath Naik she knew - was that really him? Sleep was not coming easy antara kept tossing and turning trying to find a comfortable position and as soon as she did the vibration from her phone startled her. She picked up her phone to see she had received a message Sahil and his stupid jokes she said to herself as she opened the message. Antaras heart skipped a beat it wasnt Sahil it was raghu. Hi, I know I should not have barged in on your evening out but there was no other way of getting to talk to you or for you to listen to me. I am sorry if I ruined your evening. You said it was ok for me to call I wanted to but wasnt sure if you would be awake or not. I hope I can get to speak to you soon. Raghu It was official Raghunath Naik was Schizophrenic. There was no other way of explain his behavior. This man only knows power, money and arrogance where did this human side descend from if anything it didnt suit him. Antara wanted to reply but what would she say, she really didnt want to speak to him definitely not tonight. Hi, its ok no need to apologise. I am really tired have an early start in morning so maybe we can talk tomorrow. Antara Raghu smiled at the message he had just received. Tomorrow it is.
Posted on: Tue, 28 Jan 2014 07:45:13 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015