SO, the GREAT news? I have a cyst which will need no further attention at this time. OK, now let me now state that I have the most incredible friends and support anyone could ever dream of. Thank you for all your comments, advise and stories - I thought of them all when I sat in the waiting room this morning. All of you know by now that we are not very private people and this post will be no different. I usually just bare my soul and hope that somewhere down the road the words or stories we post on my personal page and Addisons will bring you courage as you trudge through this crazy world that often likes to throw a few curve balls our way. I will also say that its sure is much more fun to be on the helping side vs. the receiving. Wow, I still am not used to that. Pretty humbling indeed. Now, before I tell you more about my morning, let me give you a SPOILER ALERT. This is pretty much for the men out there who think that models in magazines and tv actually look like that in real life. UM, quite a few of you have been with me when I look NOTHING like I look when I am airbrushed on a cover. Just prepping you. SO, to add to that, I was totally shocked when I learned that I had a lump in my breast. I mean, my exams were pretty easy since I am still waiting to hit puberty on the top half, if you get my drift. But, I have made a career doing all types of tightly fitted running, evening, swimwear, etc. modeling thanks to improvements in gel bras and such. One time comes to mind where I was heading onto the runway and just as I heard my cue, sweat loosened one of my chicken cutlets that was carefully taped to my chest. I felt it slide and I made a splitsecond decision to yank them both off and hand them to the poor college boy bus boy who was given the job of holding back the curtain. Great choice for me as I didnt worry about it sliding into the first row onto a dinner plate. Feel pretty badly for the guy who is probably now still in therapy after watching a model slink up the stairs in an evening gown, rip out her breasts and hand the sweaty gel blobs to him without comment. As I came off stage, I grabbed them from him as he was frozen in the same position, and tossed a quick,Thank you for guarding the girls over my shoulder. So that being said, breast cancer, cysts, or anything were never really front of my mind. Until now. I had my mamo first then the ultrasound. After that, the tech said it just looked like a cyst and to get dressed. She said she would run it to the radiologist who was also at that time studying my mamo. I was relieved and pretty relaxed, feeling accomplished. Then, she came back and told me to please get undressed as their was some concern and the radiologist would be right in. I know that instant panic feeling all too well. I felt it when I was hemorrhaging during my pregnancy with Madelene, when they did the ultrasound when I was pregnant with Addison and they said they thought there was something very wrong due to his lack of growth, when Madelene got stuck during birth and when Addison was diagnosed. You would think I would have a good handle on it. Nope. On the outside I can look calm, inside I was freaking. She came in and was the third person to massage my left side (honestly, my right is feeling a bit neglected today). She told me that my mamo had come out white, she couldnt read a thing since my breasts were so dense. WHAT? I then panicked that perhaps I had forgotten to take off my gel bra during the testing... As they did another ultrasound and called out a few codes/numbers to each other, I thought of all you incredible women who have breast cancer. You go through this with different results and have to do it repeatedly. Just a shout out to you, I am in awe of how you keep your cool. I know its like Addison going through so much but I could HELP, do something to make him feel better. When its your own body, you feel so helpless. FINALLY, she concluded that I have fibrous breast with a few cysts. She said my mamo showed nothing due to dense tissue which the upside being that they probably wont sag. On my way home I couldnt help but smile. Talk about appreciating everything, ups and downs in life. SO, totally my glass is not only VERY full but overflowing. If I get stranded on a desert island with a bunch of cannibals, I will be the one who survives. I mean, think about it. Nobody is going to eat the chick with the dense, fibrous, cystic breasts. YUCK...
Posted on: Tue, 03 Jun 2014 19:33:48 +0000
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