Simple White Stone- On the recent Memorial Day, or a Veterans Day, even the anniversary of D-Day, one sees little white stone with the names of those who died for this country or those who served. Many are in Arlington; many are in military cemeteries all around the land. A simple white stone that is curved on top with the name and war as well as the rank of the serviceman or woman shows honor to the deceased for what they did in life. In 1998, when Uncle Roy Elliott died, I got Marie of the local Veterans Office to honor his wishes and order his simple white stone. There was an error in the paper work and it was not the first time that a fire in the 1970’s in Washington and out of date computers had hindered Uncle Roy’s requests. In the delay, the little tin marker which the funeral director provides marked his grave. I had been Uncle Roy’s chosen power of attorney as well as his nephew who he chose to take care of his affairs. I heard comments made about the small tin sign and why did I not get Roy a nice grave marker. When the matter was cleared up I had the marker put up and hoped that would end some of the talk, but alas it did not. A few who really did not know of what they spoke, now wondered why Roy did not have a nice granite marker like others in the family. Some handfuls started vicious rumors that I had spent all of his money. What they did not know is that he never paid into the SS system and that his farm and store never made a lot of money as profits what they were, were divided between He, Uncle Roy Goforth, and Aunt Jewel Goforth, Plus they never did without and spent on others to help where they could. I remember as a child wanting Mom to get a stone for Dad that was not like most of the others, a grey hunk of granite. She did. She got a rose colored stone and I was proud of it. I am proud of Uncle Roy’s just as much. You see what those critics did not know is that Uncle Roy talked to me about what he wanted many times. When we went to Shiloh or the National Cemetery in Corinth, He told me many times that he wanted one of those markers. I had to take care of these morbid duties of planning for more than one in our family. Roy told me that he wanted others to remember that he and his brother, Grady, and cousins like J.C. Crow, had suffered as young men to hopefully make a better world and stop a great evil. I asked him if he wanted to be buried in such a place and Roy being a man loyal to his family said,” Joe, I want to buried near Momma and Papa and the others of our family at Union. This community is home, but the marker will say what I want.” I told him I would make sure his wishes were honored. Most family and friends were proud that I honored his wishes, but what I found out (and I guess I always knew) is that some people are going to talk no matter what you do. It hurt when the image of the simple white stone was forgotten by some and comments were made about money and such when none of that mattered. Uncle Roy wanted and got that simple white stone for what it stood for. Honor for his generation. Many have talked about the ‘Band of Brothers’ and the ‘Greatest Generation” but few really know or remember what they really went through. Men who served in that Great War whether in the European or Pacific Theater and may never have met before, when they did meet had the horrors of war in common. They could see it in their eyes. They knew all had suffered lost time of young lives that would never get back. Men like Roy had lost love and the hope of children of their own. They had bled to give us freedom to life the lived they should have had. Some died in conflict thinking of mothers and all had lost comrades they always thought of. Real heroes do not have to tell others about their exploits. Most would love to forget the nightmare of that time but can’t as no matter what it comes back to haunt them. Nothing, not time or even senility can take away those horrible memories. That simple white stone, stark and lonely, speaks volumes if you but listen with your heart. To Uncle Roy, Uncle Grady, the Crow Boys, and other cousins in later wars, I salute you and your sacrifices. When you see a simple white stone in a cemetery, stop and think, the soldier that lies there did so much for you. That stone links them with their brothers regardless of the time or the war. Stark, white, powerful, I cry for those that bled for us. Lest we forget.
Posted on: Sun, 08 Jun 2014 12:38:15 +0000
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