Since Friday I have seen a shift in Cadence that has concerned me. I can always tell when my kid’s relationship with God is off by the way they respond in situations. They become a little more argumentative. They start twisting their stories around and I see their honesty and attitude shift into something that concerns me. They freak out over the littlest things and everything around them becomes a state of doom and gloom. We have been talking about it with Cadence all weekend, and it was one thing after another. There seemed to be a lot of times where she speaks without thinking and ends up lying to me and then sticking to her guns on it. So yesterday she came out ready for school. I asked her if she did her daily devotional reading. It’s a mandatory, priority thing in our house. Start your day off right by getting time alone in God’s word. It is the foundation of our lives, and the starting point of each day. We make Him first because that relationship is more important than anything or any other relationship. We always receive the right guidance and direction to center ourselves to respond in the right way and learn the right things. Now, a little back story here. Our family always stays on the same reading plan so we can be growing together as a family. Recently C wasn’t getting very much out of it so we let her fly on her own and read out of a devotional book that was meeting her where she is at. So on Friday, she lost her book somewhere in her room. Her friend wanted to see it, and C really didn’t put a lot of effort into finding it. She just kinda blew it off. It wasn’t a big deal to her. As the weekend continued, there was a lot of drama, attitude and tears over literally everything and nothing. She has another devotional book that I picked up over the weekend and read something really cool in it. I left it on the page I was on in the back room. So yesterday, I asked her if she found her book. Her response was no, but I read the Princess devotional. Now 5 minutes before this, I saw the book again in the same spot on the same page. So I called her out on it. I told her she didn’t read it. I got an instant freak out because she got caught lying. If there is one thing we don’t tolerate around here it is lying. Yes, I understand she was tired. Yes, I get the fact she didn’t think before she spoke and then stuck to her guns, but come on..own up to it when you have been caught! To be honest, my biggest concern was not the lie itself. My biggest concern was her detachment and relationship with God. Somewhere along the way, that relationship that she has with Him became not the biggest priority in her life. A lot of times we as parents, or people in general see the behavior of someone and that’s all they see. I always try and look at the reason behind it, because I know that behavior is driven by something. The more we talked with her we came to realize that she has been really struggling in a lot of areas in her life. Instead of taking them to Him and keeping the right heart and attitude, she has shut herself down and been angry for her circumstances. Oh, how many times have we all been there! We tend to look at the worst in the situation or the worst in people. We focus on what we are not getting and become envious of those who seem to have everything. This was where she was living. So as a parent, I had a choice to make. Do I guide and direct and help my child, or do I leave it up to her to figure it out on her own? Society these days shows us and teaches us to figure it out on your own. Learn as you go. Make up your own mind. Ya, I lived that way. I was raised that way, and all it got me was a lot of hurt and heartache. Whether my kids are 11 or 50, I will always be the parent. I do not want to follow in the destructive footsteps that I grew up with. I would much rather take the examples that Christ set for me and put it into action. So after a long heart to heart talk with her, she is thankful and seeing clearly again. As she came out to start school today there was a new found joy in her. Her time alone with God was not a check in the box, but one that was lifting her up, bringing joy to her heart. She had the right attitude and felt centered, loved and ready for whatever the day would bring. Parenting is never an easy thing, but it is necessary. Choosing to be invasive and in the details of your child life is not can become sticky and unwanted at times. The Bible tells us to train our children to walk in the ways of the Lord. If I miss this one, I have failed miserably. Leaving it up to them to figure it out still leaves me accountable to maker. May I always recognize the signs to bring them back to Him, for that is what is important.
Posted on: Tue, 24 Sep 2013 16:45:19 +0000
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