Since Im writing my book Im using material I would usually post on FB. But I have leave you with One for the road. My dad was a great man but he was easy to read. You could tell what kind of mood he was in by looking at his pants. When they were at the normal place where pants should be worn, he was in a good mood. But when he was in a bad mood or pissed off to the highest degree of pisstivity he would pull his pants up to his shoulders and look like a turtle with its head sticking out of its shell. When I was a kid I wanted a Schwinn Continental bicycle. That was my dream bike but I knew my dad would have a fit about how much the bike cost. So I decided to be an extra good son and now the lawn, wash my dads car and shined his shoes. As Im working my tail off my dad comes over where I was cutting grass and said Wow Tim!! Youre doing a good job!! As hes talking I notice his pants are at the normal place, which was a good sign. Then as Im washing his car he comes up to me and says Wow Tim!! Youre doing a good job! Then again I look at his pants and they are at the normal place. Another good sign!! Next Im in the house shining his shoes when fe comes over to me and says Wow Tim! Youre going a good job!! Again I look at his pants and they are in the normal place. Since the signs show that hes in a good mood I devices to ask him to but me the bike. I got my nerve up and said Hey dad, I was just wondering if you could buy me a Schwinn Continental bike? Its only $131.00. My dad just stood there and didnt say anything!! I knew the bike was a lot of money but I didnt his brain would lock up!! When he opened his mouth he said Im going upstairs for a minute. Ill let you know what I decided when I come back downstairs. He goes upstairs and stays for what seemed like an hour. As hes walking down the stairs I noticed his pants were up to his shoulders. Now Im getting bummed out. I guess Im not getting the bike. When he got to the last step he just stood there looking like the original Ninja Turtle named Hank!! He didnt say a word, he just stood there with his pants pulled up to his shoulders. So I said From the look of your pants I guess youre mad at me. Im sorry for upsetting you about buying me the bike. My father looked me right in my eyes and said My pants look like this because I just finished taking a shit!! I got the bike!!
Posted on: Tue, 28 Jan 2014 17:15:51 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015