So I am walking the river today while reading “Why Football Matters” by Mark Edmundson and I step around a dark blob on the sidewalk and happen to look back and see that it’s dog poo. I’m like, “Hmm, I should move that, the next person might not be so lucky.” So I get a small stick and I’m carefully flicking chunks of this poo off the sidewalk, into the rocks off the path, and this man dressed like the male version of Courtney Love stops just long enough to sneer at me and say, “People like you disgust me.” He gives me an intense look of hate while I make one of those weird laughing noises where I sound like a hive of bees and a baby sneeze, and I might have been able to tell him I don’t own a dog if not for being overcome with my own weirdness. I go back to my task and a woman on a bicycle stops and says, “You’re what’s wrong with this country. If everyone acted like you, this trail would be covered in dog sh**. You want to be a dog owner? Then plan ahead. Next time, bring a bag.” Then she zooms away on her bike with her flashy pink fitness clothes and I finish with the poo and keep walking and reading my book. Later, along the highway this other woman suddenly pulls her car over to yell something at me and I don’t stop cause I’m like, do I need this in my life? I dont think so. But she keeps yelling, three more times she yells, and I finally walk over to her to see what is up and she yells, “HAVE YOU READ GAME OF THRONES??” Me: YES!!! Woman: Great book!!! Me: YES!!! Woman: I love it!!! Me: [nodding head with dopey book-gasm smile] Have you read Outlander?? Woman: [shakes head no] Me: I LOVE it. If you like Game of Thrones, you’d love Outlander. [Then I’m seized by my love of Outlander and cannot even speak anymore, because whoa, the awesome. Though I do have enough presence of mind to also mention it is now a TV show on Starz. But the BOOK. The Book.] Woman: [looking fiercely determined] All right. Outlander. I’m getting it. Me: [Nodding like YES. Yes Life Is Good.] Woman zooms off in her car and I go back to reading Why Football Matters and listening to the Outlander theme music in my head. Sometimes people totally rock my world. :D
Posted on: Thu, 16 Oct 2014 01:26:54 +0000
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