So. Karma caught me in a head lock. Last night I was ranting on those who bleach their assholes. I would say anus, but I think we need to be very clear here. They BLEACH THEIR ASSHOLES. That job title has to be a doozy. Anyway, we were pondering the whys and WTFs about asshole bleaching and I swore I would never, ever, EVER do it. People who do it are the epitome of fakeness, and I have never been accused of being fake.... And who the hell sees your asshole? Joe is the only one who sees mine, whenever he earns The Full Moon, which may involve some manual cheek spreading to ensure full impact of the gravity of the situation.... But you really have to EARN that one. So. This morning I noticed something in the shower. On my butt. Really close to the chocolate starfish... A zit. A big, juicy, painful zit. Like a sea urchin. Right next to his best friend, the starfish. And Joey wont pop the sea urchin for me, because my starfish is not bleached. Sigh. Thank you, Aunty Karma, for reminding me that people can bleach their assholes if they want to. It is not my cheese, my monkey, nor my circus. I apologize to all asshole-bleachers, from the bottom of my chocolate starfish.
Posted on: Sat, 18 Oct 2014 15:08:19 +0000
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