So much going on in my small corner of the world. Marshall is gone on a family visit for weeks. A carpenter has ripped out our kitchen and the sink stands all on its lonesome, lost and alone. The stove is gone, concrete abounds, and the rebuilding seems weeks and months in the future. Peter Clay has come wandering through on a weeks long journey for earth justice of marching and civil disobedience. We go out for a movie this night - PRIDE, great movie - a comedy, a tear jerker, and a great moment of women singing Bread & Roses in the best arrangement Ive ever heard - https://youtube/watch?v=E2ISkeEc-9U Dont miss this movie. A few days ago as news came of new low temps heading this way from the north and west, I dragged some boxes from the shed and began to fill them with kindling from what had been the great heap of firewood now stacked in the wood shed. On my knees I found large and small pieces of wood among the pine needles and collected them and filled boxes for maybe an hour on a bright sunny day beneath large maple and pine trees on the little grassy road just above our home. How much will get us through the winter? Kindling makes a larger fire possible. A box of kindling looks insignificant next to a stack of firewood. But it is the kindling, the small beginning of a little heat concentrating a focus that makes a big fire possible. Sometimes I feel like kindling, the small bit of heat focussed on something greater. I feel reverence and stillness gather within and concentrate and focus and surrender and suddenly a larger thing is taking place. The indigenous of Brazil say the spirit comes down and rides the shaman like a horse and while I love that image, I dont feel much like a horse. I feel more like kindling. I have days when I am more patient and quiet and can listen better. I might even have a smidgen of wisdom. Then there are the days when I am quite sure Ive never known anything or done anything useful ever. Most days I can be kindling. I can be small, put myself in place, and be of use for something larger. There is a moment of lift off when I am not just me but I am part of the great mystery hurdling towards Light and balance for someone and I feel totally washed and clear. Its almost like falling in love, but better. Its better because I can go back there and back there again and again. Its more than simple kindness. Its joining with forces weve never been able to name well enough, maybe because it is beyond naming. In a few days a new sink will come and then we measure to see if it fits and make calls to a plumber and an electrician with fingers crossed that they can come see us before Easter. Meanwhile a toaster is all the cooking I can master and sandwiches of raw things becomes my cuisine. I suppose its the simple that anchors us all for that moment of cosmic reaching when the stars call us to be incredible.
Posted on: Thu, 13 Nov 2014 05:22:47 +0000
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