So when I was in Vegas at the Wedding MBA conference, they had exhibits open for two days, a lot of really random weird crap, like a website to help you select what your new married name should be (umm, why would you pay for that, just pick a name. Its not a trick question, and you know which names to choose from), to wedding games (because nothing says piss your guests off by forcing them to play bean bag toss games like theyre at a flippin backwoods Deliverance shindig and the canoe ride is next) to a myriad of other excessive, random wedding related crap--not like cake stuff, because cake is LEGIT, you eat cake and people like cake, its food, it makes sense, and that whole dumb conference barely mentioned the word cake which is abominable. They should just start calling weddings Get together to eat a lot of cake and I bet a butt load more people would start going to them--any how, we found this really cool booth with these two young ladies who were selling handmade soap. If there is anything I like better than eating, its soaping up. I could do that for hours, and it just never gets old. So, my sister and I start chatting up and smelling the amazing array of scents, some woodsy, some musky, some floral, and my favorite, the earthy smells, beach, mountain air, you know manly clean smells, because when Im soaping up, I like to pretend a rugged, outdoorsy man and his equally rugged, outdoorsy friends are soaping me up, very fresh, crisp and platonic, of course...so, the young ladies hand each of us this little herbal bath sachet. The pretty young woman delivers her sales shpeal like a boss, and tells us how to use it, and we start sniffing those and trying to find one that we like, and blah, blah, blah and so this morning, once the kids are at school, I bust out that sachet and pour a smoking hot bath, put my tunes on and pop the sachet into the burning water. I delicately dip my foot in, immerse myself as the heat of the water scorches my skin, and lean back into the tub for a relaxing soak. Im expecting to be enveloped the soothing odors of lavendar, vanilla, citrus and the like. Instead, about two minutes in, I smell cabbage. Cabbage and rosemary. Cabbage, rosemary and what is that? Is that thyme? Sage? It occurs to me Im not taking an herbal bath, Im cooking myself in some kind of homemade soup starter. What the what? It smelled just like that cabbage soup diet soup, and as I lay there, simmering, err, bathing, I just felt so weird, and maybe, delicious. I think Ill stick with the soaps, and leave the soup starters to Lipton and Progresso.
Posted on: Mon, 21 Oct 2013 23:46:06 +0000
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