So when people follow me around the store and ask me if I need help 100 times as a protective strategy against my assumed theft-inclination, I respond by letting them help me push my cart or carry my basket. Yes! I need help...can you carry this basket for me? Then I proceed to take my sweet time. Yes, I take my time comparing peanut butter or roller ball pens or exactly which socks I want...tube socks or ankle socks...desicions, decisions! You would think that it is a life and death decision given the time and contemplation I give to making a purchase when a profiling employee follows me around. The employee gets to take my stuff up to the check out and I will even ask that they help me take my purchases to my car. And given that they were following me and constantly asking me if I need help they cannot refuse. Want to be really irritating? Talk on your cell phone--leisurely--while you shop. Everyone observing this spectacle will begin to wonder which one of Oprahs or Barack Obama s relatives you are due to all that special treatment. Hell, some people might start demanding it! Why cant someone follow ME around the store? Im just as good as she is! This is kind of like the Tai Chi principle of disabling a blow by providing no resistance. And, it is pretty darn funny too.
Posted on: Fri, 05 Sep 2014 22:21:04 +0000
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