Some of you may have noticed that Ive been unusually silent lately... Ive had a lot going on. I think the Holidays have brought on a bout of reflection... Ive been meditating on gratitude, and what it means to be grateful. Being thankful isnt just words... Its the action behind the words. A year ago I took care of a young boy... I saw to it that he had presents, and a Christmas tree, and something to look forward to. I think he liked most of what I had gotten him. It was my one and only Christmas to spend with him, as he left to go live with his mother soon afterward. Some of his gifts that I had bought him was left behind. He also had left a piece of my heart behind as well. As I mourned his going, I grew resentful - those Christmas gifts were expensive. I worked long hours on a job that barely paid me minimum wage, and then I came home to a mountain of chores, and cooking dinner, and waiting on the boys father... And I struggled with the burden of it all because I had never been a mother before, and I felt certain that I didnt measure up in the boys eyes or in his fathers. But, I didnt quit because I knew that the boy was worth it. And I hoped that the presents would help to make up for what I obviously lacked. I did feel resentful, and hurt, and very sad... And since I have been thinking on gratitude, I have to say that... Jesus knows all too well how I feel. How many times has He given us gifts, been a loving and doting parent, pulled us out of Hells fires time and again... Yet weve hurt Him, ridiculed Him by our lifestyle choices, crucified Him with our indifference... We may not have lived over 2000 years ago to see Jesus die on the cross, but we would still like to kill Him all the same today.... If I could tell that boy something today, I would say that I am grateful.. As I did his laundry, cooked his dinner and made him eat his vegetables, talked and laughed with him, took walks in the pasture with him, tried to encourage him in his chores, in his schoolwork, in his friendships at school, taking an interest in his appearance, his health, and taking the time to pray with him... I am grateful. I hope he could tell. Im sure it wasnt enough, because it wasnt enough for me . I am grateful for that boy... My life was better for him in it . I was the lucky one to be able to buy him those presents last Christmas. I was the lucky one...
Posted on: Mon, 16 Dec 2013 06:06:02 +0000