Some people talk about chemistry as if its a bad thing. Like we should be wary of the people were attracted to the most. And I understand why this is a common warning — because these people tend to bring our issues to the surface. Its true that strong attraction makes for a wild ride in love. But the question is: is that really a bad thing? Some people will say yes. Sure, if you want life to be easy, then the path of strong attraction isnt for you (side note: is there an easy path? Im still trying to figure that one out). Of course, we all want love to be uncomplicated. But we are complicated! So why would our relationships be anything less? From a spiritual perspective, love is supposed to be a wild ride. This doesnt mean that we should stick around in relationships that are abusive or feel horrible to be in. But it does mean we should recognize that love will provoke us to grow into fuller versions of ourselves. And this isnt easy! Feelings such as insecurity, doubt, fear, jealousy, judgement, and contempt (all ego feelings) can appear with the people we desire most. Because of this, many of us categorize these highly attractive relationships as bad or unhealthy. Spiritually speaking, however, these relationships are doing what theyre supposed to do — theyre provoking your ego to surface so you can transform it. When we remember that relationships are meant to teach us growth, we approach the bad very differently. We know that there is a lesson in every challenge — that lesson is to regain a connection to love. Lessons of love take on many different forms. Sometimes reconnecting with love means leaving the relationship. Sometimes reconnecting with love means sticking around and working through the challenges. Sometimes the lesson is learning to forgive your partner. Sometimes the lesson is learning to forgive yourself. Yes, we all want peace in relationships; theyre supposed to be blissful and loving. And when they arent, we know weve fallen off the path of love and we have to get back on track. This is how we grow. Dont bypass or downplay the chemistry you feel; remember that it exists for a reason. The people youre most attracted to are your greatest teachers in love. Show up for the lessons they have for you.
Posted on: Sun, 21 Dec 2014 11:45:50 +0000
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