Something Ive been wanting to say about me for awhile but didnt want people to think I was just trying to gain attention or having a pity party. More of an explanation that some have recognized but think they would offend me by asking. Things to do with my illnesses i always will answer questions no matter how embarrassing they are. You never know when it may help someone else. Its only been recently since ive been talking about having Sjogrens Syndrome. It became more serious after my crohns disease went into remission 8 years ago. Which Im thankful. Sjogrens syndrome has caused me severe dry eyes, dental issues, fatigue, dry mouth dry skin, dehydration and I dont sweat just to name a few. This is why my face will tend to get really red and I get over heated fast. I make less than 2-5% tears and saliva. Because of this my salivary glands become infected and my teeth are deteriorating. Because I dont make enough saliva, this means I dont have enough to wash the bacteria away like a normal person. Which starts to break down my tooth enamel, and im more susceptible to decay and teeth cracking and crumbling. Which is why Im really embarrassed about my teeth and smiling or speaking to people. Guess you can say this is why Im all about the pups and training. Between my super dry and sometimes red swollen eyes and bad teeth, I tend not to go out a whole lot. The amount of money that ive spent for crowns in the last 10 years I could have bought a car. But now no insurance. Even with insurance, still extremely expensive. But there are always living expenses to deal with. I am very blessed to have wonderful parents helping when they can. And its a temp fix. I brush my teeth 3-5 times a day with special toothpaste, biotine mouthwash, you name it i do it but it never looks like it. With my extreme anxiety with dental and medical procedures. I tend to put things like my health on the back burner. As long as I keep busy I dont focus on the pain. I developed anxiety when I was diagnosed with a problem with not responding to pain meds, anesthesia. I wake up during surgeries, procedures or its hard to put me under. Which has caused some procedures to be done while I was a wake like Transbronchial biopsy to determine what kind of pneumonia I had. When they flushed my lungs it was like drowning. Which is why I love doing my dog training, fostering and helping dogs. Its the only time I feel confident. But the down side I have to talk to pet parents and others about something I should be smiling about. Sometimes it may seem im holding back. I hope sharing this may give some insight why i sometimes hold my hand up to my mouth while talking or sometimes cant look directly in your eyes. Because of Sjogrens syndrome New allergies are popping up, like dog, cat, flowers etc. But I will never give up training or fostering dogs. Its the only time Im smiling inside.
Posted on: Thu, 10 Jul 2014 04:44:23 +0000
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