Sorry in advance but Im going to rant on Facebook. How lame. I know Ive posted similar things before the feelings I have are so explosive that I cant contain them to myself. I just feel like theyre constantly beating at my soul and I need to get it out. Because Im sure at least one person will feel where Im coming from if I put it here for a bunch of people to see as opposed to talking to a few in real life who just dont understand how my scrambled brain works. So here we go! Ive had numerous people tell me I should put myself out there more. OUT WHERE? Ive met heaps of great people. Id rather 5 good friends than 50 shitty friends. Quality over quantity. Unless were talking about things involving girls. Im just picky, okay. I cant help it. Is it so wrong to know exactly what type of woman I want? The average person can see someone, find them hot and just go for them. Well I cant do that! Im sorry! I just have a hard time seeing most girls as a potential mate, even if they are attractive. There has to be something else there! Like there is a certain feeling I get right off the bat. I have found someone like that buuuut she doesnt know yet because Im foolish. I guess Ive been nervous because of the fact that it is so hard for me to see someone that way. If she rejects me, Ill have to potentially face another handful of years without the thrill of seeing someone in the same light, and Im not really looking forward to that if that ends up being the case to be honest. I know you need to get to know someone before you know what type of person they are and before having feelings for them...but I dont know! Sometimes I just feel a connection with someone as soon as I meet them. They just have good vibrations. Some people feel right and some people just feel off. But Im the stupid. Ha Ha look at stupid, naive Tayaun. He doesnt even have a clue! He has no experience. What does he know? Those are the sort of attitudes that Im presented with. Im not saying youre wrong, I just feel differently. I feel the way I see things and the way I feel is wrong because I I have no experience. There are plenty of people who have experience but still lack skills, common sense or have poor instincts...whatever. Its so frustrating when Im told how I should feel when people cant even feel when something feels like its wrong or they cant feel their own/someone elses presence, two things that Ive always been able to do my entire life. It just comes so naturally to me! Like being able to see the outline around my body. My aura as Ive learned that its called. Mine is blue. Ive always been able to see that. And its hard describing it to people because I just feel like they dont understand or feel like Im making it up. Ive had people look at me like Im crazy. Its like, imagine telling someone that you can touch your nose, something that is so simple, and people look at you like youre full of shit. I feel like Im supposed to follow the norms of society rather than follow and know my own spirit. I mean I could just as easily ask you: How can you not be in touch with yourself? How can you not know how to create balls of energy in your hands? How could you have never had a premonition? What are you, stupid? Its so easy! You think the spirits of dead people dont exist? HA HA! Ive seen these things with my own two eyes! Oh but theyre the devils work. OOOoooH! EVIIIIL! Yeah, cause my Grandmother was totally evil. I am judging you for not experiencing what I have! You suck! How does that make you feel? Makes me feel like crap to be honest. People are just afraid of what they cant see. Afraid of the unknown. Im not afraid though. In fact, I welcome it. But I digress, I dont want to have all these girls flocking to my feet. I only want that one girl to look at me like I brighten up her day. And Im not going to be one of those people that get bored of being with one person and decide to get with another. NO! Do what you want but I will never succumb to it. My loyalty runs too deep! The human body is 70% water. My body is 100% loyalty. YOU DO THE MATH! Perhaps Im going about this all wrong though. Maybe I should just take more photos of me flexing without my shirt on. Then people will definitely know that I work out, all the girlies will start leaking and Ill get heaps and heaps of likes! And while Im at it, I might as well try and force some new memes! Ive got this shit made! Oh wait I dont want to be a hypocrite though. If thats what your life is about, then so be it. Really. Im not even being sarcastic. Seriously, If thats what makes you happy and youre not hurting anybody or doing really bad things, then continue doing your thing. P.S. Yes, yes I know what you mean by putting myself out there. Im just being a smart ass. P.P.S. *phew* Wow that was long. I have so much tension built up. I will try to stay positive. Im sorry if Ive somehow annoyed anyone. You dont need to worry about making me feel better. I already feel better.
Posted on: Fri, 05 Dec 2014 10:56:53 +0000
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