Stop talking about where you went to college. - Always carry cash. - Rebel from business casual. Burn your khakis and wear a suit or jeans. - It’s OK to trade the possibility of your 80s and 90s for more guaranteed fun in your 20s and 30s. - Never stay out after midnight three nights in a row… Unless something really good comes up on the third night. - You will regret your tattoo. - Never date an ex of your friend. - If riding the bus doesn’t encourage you to improve your station in life, nothing will. - Time is too short to do your own laundry. - When the bartender asks, you should already know what you want to drink. - When people don’t invite you to a party, you really shouldn’t go. And sometimes even when you are invited, you shouldn’t go. - People are tired of you being the funny, drunk guy. - When in doubt, always kiss the girl. - You probably use your cell phone too often and at the wrong moments. - Buy expensive sunglasses. Superficial? Yes, but so are the women judging you. And it tells these women you appreciate nice things and are responsible enough not to lose them. - Be a regular at more than one bar. - Act like you’ve been there before. It doesn’t matter if it’s in the end zone at the Super Bowl or on a private plane. - A glass of wine or two with lunch will not ruin your day. - No selfies. Aspire to experience photo-worthy moments in the company of a beautiful woman. - Ask for a salad instead of fries. - Don’t split the cheque. - Pretty woman who are unaccompanied want you to talk to them. - The cliché is that having money is about not wasting time. But in reality, money is about facilitating spontaneity. - Be spontaneous. - Find a Times New Roman in the streets and a Wingdings in the sheets. She exists. - Desserts are for women. Order one and pretend you don’t mind that she’s eating yours. - Buy a tuxedo before you are 30. Stay that size. - One girlfriend at a time is probably enough. - #stopwiththehashtags - Measure yourself only against your previous self. - Take more pictures with a camera. - Place-dropping is worse than name-dropping. - Your clothes do not match. They go together. - Yes, of course you have to buy her dinner. - Revenge can be a good way of getting over anger. - If she expects the person you are 20% of the time, 100% of the time, then she doesn’t want you. - Avoid that ‘last’ whiskey. You’ve probably had enough. - If you are wittier than you are handsome, avoid loud clubs. - Date women outside your social set. You’ll be surprised. - If it’s got velvet ropes and lines, walk away unless you know someone. - You cannot have a love affair with whiskey because whiskey will never love you back. - Never take an ex back. She tried to do better and is settling with you. - Ignore the boos. They usually come from the cheap seats. - Hookers aren’t cool, but remember, the free ones are a lot more expensive. 8) - Don’t ever say, “it is what it is.” - Start a wine collection for your kids when they are born. Add a few cases every year without telling them. It’ll make a phenomenal gift in 20 years. - Don’t gamble if losing $100 is going to piss you off.
Posted on: Sat, 19 Oct 2013 00:29:09 +0000
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