THIS is NOT how I expected to start the New Year...but its a first! At 7:30am I was beginning to stir beneath the covers when something hit the floor in the master bathroom. Had Skunk Kitty the cat knocked something over? Nope! I sat up and opened my eyes to see the unexpected. A squirrel came flying out of the bathroom, through my bedroom, out the bedroom door, hung a hard left and zipped into the computer room next door. Mind you, I did not drink last night, however I wasnt fully awake either. I rose from my bed and began to frantically pull on clothes and shoes while all manner of racket emanated from the next room. I heard things being knocked over, hitting the floor and the desks. As quick as I could with morning locked, creaky joints, I got to the computer room doorway. Monsieur Squirrel was in the process of running across the top of a dragon display shelf affixed to the wall behind my wifes desk. The table lamp was knocked over, lampshade on the floor; the modem sat askew, a box of Kleenex, supermarket circulars and a waste basket were still in motion on the way to the floor as the cute, but destructive rodent launched itself at the closed window. Fully illuminated by the morning light, that window must have been quite a surprise when, rather than shooting through it like a fuzzy missile, forward progress to freedom came to an abrupt halt. I dont think that little guys vision is very good as that window needs a good cleaning. As I said, I wasnt really awake yet. Amy, my niece, will appreciate what I did next. I calmly walked to the other end of the house, put on a pot of coffee and fed my cat. My little dog Mia sees herself as the great gray huntress when outside. Chipmunks, squirrels, birds and leaves beware. Mia is there and ready for the chase and take down. Well, Mia didnt have a clue. She had no idea the squirrel was in the bedroom as it was in the next room before her sleep grizzled visage cleared the blanket under which she burrows each night. I have closed the door and Im in the room with a fugitive squirrel who is obviously in the witness protection program as I cannot find him. I know hes here because as I clambered atop the table to reach the gut wrenchingly hard to open window, without stepping on the printer mind you, he was wigging out...scuffling along the windowsill at my approach, playing Tarzan on the curtain as I reached for the stubborn window, then diving behind my wifes desk. I must admit, Im glad hes behind the desk because the Griswald Christmas tree scene went through my head as I straddled the printer on my precarious perch. I got the window up and, as is my typical luck, it wouldnt stay up on its own. It now stands propped open, screen up, allowing the cold morning air on this first day of January 2015 to flow across my legs and put more than just a nip in the air. I dare not leave as I need to see the little bugger make his escape to be sure hes actually gone. Im being held captive in my own home, by a now invisible intruder. I can smell the coffee. I want the coffee. But even more than wanting the coffee, I want to see the intruder find his freedom. My wife just got home and looked thoroughly confused until I explained why things were at 6s and 7s. God bless her, she brought me a cup of coffee. Shes a fearless one, now sitting at her desk, knowing an errant squirrel is hidden feet away...from her feet! We both have the same question. How did he get in?
Posted on: Thu, 01 Jan 2015 13:34:43 +0000
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