TITLED - The history of religion [the real history] and my experiences of the metaphysical. Went to bed and tossed and turned as inspiration came to me. It became evident to me - as i remember being 15 - that the battle was not internal as in some physical defect - it was from my POV a conflict in a spiritual nature. Which is an odd gift i have to discern such things. However; that was my first coming of age conflict and i truly couldnt understand it. It was really outside of me - and i sensed the nature of it - tho i didnt know the nature of it. I have a strange gift of discerning spirits. At that time - i didnt comprehend what the feeling was externally.that caused internal grief. I believed the manifestations of the spiritual battle to be me and it seemed to be some defect in me. Reviewing it last night til i forced myself to sleep - i realized i could sense even then it was unkind spirits feeding me those fears and ideas. The battle became mine in that i had to deliberate carefully - i had to logically go back to my earlier years and all i was told by my mom and gram how boy crazy i was my whole life. Also - owing to the fact i almost got kicked out of 1st grade testing because i couldnt keep my eyes off John Thornton. They thot i was cheating. But he was my first real crush... [which lasted til 4th grade when he moved] However; reviewing the truth of who i was - and standing firm in it - i was able to overcome that battle. It ceased when i recognized it was not true. Therefore i found relief. Because i noticed it was lies externally thru the spiritual battlefield. Another battle i remember was one of suicide back in 1992 - when i had the picture of Our Lady of Guadalupe in my house. When the picture was gone - the battles began... 1st one - was easiest to discern because i was under attack...literally and Greg was a witness to it. 2nd one - the nightmares i had of demons trying to terrify me into fearing Our Lady. But even in my dreams i caught on what it was...and they ceased. 3rd one - God doesnt love me - i sinned - kill myself. I hated that one - and thats when things came to a definitive understanding what the feeling is that emanates from them. One thing otherwise brought it to my attention... Touching the ouija board - had the effect - and i battled then - picking up the sensory perception of what it was. Which unfortunately - isnt something anyone should do - but i did. Never ever touch one of those. It was also the ouija board that said i would understand the universe. I have kept this in mind - the entire past 6 months i studied it. Including the tarot i was observing. The cards can go either way - it can be be deceptive. Which can cause panic. When using them - you are not trusting God. Though i understood this - i did it anyway... but i am reflective now - it gave no answers but caused me a lot of grief. Psychological grief. I studied the universe - indeed. And its possible the planetary alignments can create certain battles inside of us. Perhaps this is how our emotions and moods are pushed and pulled. How doubts surface - how we can make wrong choices - but one thing remains all too clear - we maintain free will. We can allow them to cause us to do things we normally would not do.. or we can overcome them - in only one way - through recognition of why and where we have doubts - and if we arent trusting God. The gifts from God - that i have been given - have been serving me this last year. I prayed last night ... and then when i lay down - things started coming to me. Understandings started coming to me. One thing i cannot forget - the dream of the battle i would face. All this last year i tried to pin point those battles. Its not easy - especially when i wasnt able to discern the spiritual battle as clearly as i could, previously. But here are a few i remembered: The last 21 years of battle trying to do what God wanted - thinking i was forced to maintain a marriage i never wanted in the first place. Because of my religious convictions to work thru the hardest of times. Which is what we should do - but - i often forgot i didnt want to marry him. So - last March when i heard the Homily on annulment i felt calm. Like the battle settled down. God never wanted this for me... even the signs i had before i did it - wasnt about me having to it... i misunderstood so much. God had set up a destiny for me - but regardless of which path i took - under false assumptions i was to be with Greg somehow - God still kept fate in mind. He constantly gave me dreams and signs as is par for the course of my life... that would eventually - now - be understood. Now i could look at all of this and say it sounds whacked. HAD i not seen the instances where my senses and dreams had evidence that yes i do have a gift. But being human - and having said gifts doesnt mean i understand everything. Its only thru time and situations unfolding - was i ever able to believe in the gifts. IE - only when proof was in the pudding so they say. Life is tricky. Gifts regarding the metaphysical is tricky. These things dont come with instructions. Well, not usually. Altho i have had immense help through out my life - i was also let alone to do battle and life is truly with the physical eyes - a blindfold to that which is going on in the spiritual world. Science and everything else - the medical field - and most of all the psychological field... put only faith in practice in whats in front of them. Unfortunately the world reduces and often times eliminates the reality of the spiritual side of life. As tho we dont have one. As tho it doesnt matter. Which if you cannot see something - the world says it simply does not exist. Yet for all the work science does - it cannot explain why life ends. Or what life really is about. Why are we animated? The very complex workings of the human body are incredible....and exceptionally more complex than it seems. Studying Medical Assistant - and having to know the bodily processes - its dang complex. Its not this and that were talking down to the dna micro stages - things are happening within. One process relies on the other. And the body isnt simple. Nothing about one cells work is simple. Its a unit - but within the unit are many units - all animated in a healthy body - has such diverse mechanisms. The more i studied the more amazed i was that the human body could possibly carry on such complexities just because...it can. It is amazing to say the least. And by no means - is a habit or just is kind of thing. Its more dynamic than a computer. Its so very detailed... every strand of RNA and DNA - every step that must be ordered and healthy can affect the rest of the whole system. The human body - heck the human eye itself in great detail, comes from a Master. An Intelligent life force. A Creator that put it together. There is no way anyone could tell me we appeared, or we somehow self created from dirt soup. Its impossible to look so deeply into the human bodies processes and not take away awe from seeing it. Our animation is soul driven. There is nothing in all the wonders of the body that attaches itself to how it works...only that it works. But we are made up so - the question really is - how - does it remain animated? Because as complex as it is - none of it has an animation processor. It just is. We are souls living within the confines of the flesh. So life is a battlefield..between what we can see and what exists outside the realm of vision...using only intuition to understand it. The human mind can shut off intuition... we can ignore it. I believe science looks at the spiritual complexities as emotional or mental problems. As for example - the gentleman at Church who stood in the back and could not enter the Church [for years]. This is called tourettes syndrome. His constant cursing. He pacing. Ppl walked by him - without paying any attention. God gave me the gift of spiritual discernment - knowing how to sense evil. And i was not comfortable at all - being near him because i felt it. The power of the Mass - truly helped him. Every time i was at Mass - i offered it up for him. But i always wondered why - yes why he came to me and sat down in front of me..and looked up at [which was amazing he entered thru the doors of Church at all] - and said - looking directly at me - I see an angel. Of all the ppl there - how did he know it was me offering up Mass for him?? And most of all - entering the doors confounded me at first until he said what he said. Then i pondered this a long time. Something i wont forget. Somehow he was directed to show me - being completely spiritually in tune at that time - that my offerings worked. The angel part confounds me. Was he referring to me or did he see an angel directing him to come to me?? Nevertheless; the gentleman still attends Mass - he comes into Church and he sits closer to the altar. He doesnt recognize me now. I dont feel anything near him like i did. I couldnt take being near him back then. Within 3 feet and i felt repulsed. Not because he cursed like a sailor - but because the essence surrounding him. It caused my antennae to go off. It was off the charts horrible. His cure was sudden and complete. And only thru offering up Mass. I noticed the world today has hit gigantic proportions of emotional and psychological distresses like never before. All of which directly coincides with the lack of Mass attendance as well as firm faith in the Lord...and what He gave us precisely to know Him. Were talking mass confusion world wide. If you know the backgrounds of all religions - you could understand this more. There was once two religions. From the beginning was the one faith - it was simply in God. As the world moved away from the initial parents and humanity had only one set of parents. As the humans dispersed - leaving behind the world they knew where God spoke to them - they carried the inner knowing of God - but it became imperfect...thus pagans arose. Its like the game of telephone. By the time you get to the end - the message is changed. So it makes logical sense - paganism would arise. Taking the initial understanding of God - and creating what they thot they knew. As generations arose - the understanding gained imperfections and the one God multiplied into several - plural. However; innately they knew there was more than one - but in human imperfect comprehension they made the one into several. Because God is Three...in One. No one can possibly understand that concept - we see ourselves as simple one. Thus subdivisions arose. Then God kept His ppl close to Himself - in giving them a line to keep pure so He could come thru them to us. Purity - because God is from purity. So then we had two religions. Those with the laws from God - those outside who lost knowledge of how things worked. But that was ok - God didnt abandon them - nor judged them based on faulted stories. He still gave them a conscience. The conscience to know right away from wrong - so ppl still did good. As good is a direct opposition to bad. They chose which to do and follow. But the good were judged on their actions following the conscience God gave them for lack of knowing the laws. Meantime the religion with His laws - gave us Him Who died for us. So after His death - we had 3 major religions. However the pagans untied to the Church and the fairy tales dissolved. They finally were allowed truth. And they could see in miracles and such from the Apostles that altho not shown any miracles of those proportions prior - the Apostles had truth and the men they ordained to carry on after them. So pagans converted. They formerly pagan - destroyed the statues they erected. Which caused rumors that the Catholics did this. Well, yes, but it was the ones who formerly believed who became Catholic who did it. And as it occurred during the time of the Apostles - false teachings of Christianity popped up - but were dispelled of immediately thru the Apostles. Much of Pauls writings were about destroying the false from the real. And all thru history - the Church maintained most of the fathers ordained thru and by the Apostles - they kept the writings. And so it goes - as generations passed - more heresies popped up. More writings were made from the Church. The Church didnt change their teachings but time and again did battle to those who came up with false ideas. Which as they say - nothing new under the sun. So in 620 AD Muhammad arose with a new heresy. His took hold - because it favored men. It gave them everything they wanted - but most of all - it took the ancestry from Abraham - the illegitimate child who was sent away - and lifted up his place. IE - it was pride that caused so many to follow this. Because they were no longer noted as the illegitimate children - but became the rightful heirs. If we know the story behind Abraham, Sarah and Agar. Then we would understood how this all worked. Sarah sent her maid Agar in to Abraham to give him an heir. But soon after an angel told Sarah in her old age she would have a child too. So Sarah sent Agar away. Abraham asked the Lord to give favor to the illegitimate child and Gods only promise to that child was a great number would arise. But the rightful heir was Sarahs child. And the children of each fought for generations... all the way to Islam. Then in the 1500s - Martin Luther rose. Now indulgences were always a practice in the Church. That is to mean - offering up for the dead. Its clearly noted in Maccabees when Joseph offered up silver for the souls of those who battled alongside the Jews to win... Thats an indulgence. It is ancient practice of making an offering for the dead. It was Jewish.. and that didnt end in fact - it became more practiced after the teachings of Jesus explaining it needed done. So then we have Martin Luther mad as a hornet that the Church used indulgences [faulted priests and so forth] to build the Cathedral of St Peter. They made promises that sins would be pardoned and skip purgatory if they gave. Well, imho - those indulgences were noted by God and kept - even if done imperfectly - God always allowed His Church to have it their way. So thats what got Luther going. He then - as ironic as this is - tried to cripple the authority of the Pope - he undermined him and his chair... he made ppl question it. And he taught his own flavor of Christianity. The irony? He made himself a pope - while criticizing the one of the Church. Isnt that irony? I did forget the schisms - back in 1054 AD the East and West battled it out - and the Church divded itno two parts bot speaking to one another again - over authority. But both maintained the similar Traditions. Also the same is true for the Coptics who broke off in the 400s due to barriers - but they also maintained similar Traditions. Which is proof Tradition didnt change. The Pope has - as teacher of the church - been able to explain Tradition via the Holy Spirit thru out the ages. Whereas the other two parts of the original Church - had no such authority and they simply believe without full disclosure of understanding - the similar Traditions. Its only the Catholic Church with the Pope who has it detailed... for our more complete understanding. The other two - well they say We believe and thats good. Tho they dont understand it - they simply believe in it. The Pope gave us understanding as is his role. Ok enough of the schism - thats a very very deep subject and one i did battle about in christianforums against the Eastern Orthodox. However; made some enemies - made some friends. Well, during the time of Martin Luther others arose - creating their own flavors of teachings as well. So these mini popes came up. Calvin - which is Presbyterian. Zwigli - who created Baptists. And also during this time - came the break of the church in England. The very upset King Henry who wanted to divorce - wast happy when he wasnt allowed. So he took the Bishop of that church [disocese its called] - and became the boss instead of the Pope. Breaking off the Popes jurisdiction. Anglican or Church fo England they are called. They keep Tradition - but not perfectly or fully. The mindset of protestantism made its way in. And they ordained illicitly [ie illegally] against the one churchs jurisdiction. And after all that - came the French revolution which caused many many different beliefs and panic set in against the major rule of the state. I believe Marie Antionette...et al. Then because at the time the church had authority to rule over matters of faith and morals - they too were attacked. For 100 years anyone known to be Catholic - were killed. And theres religious history 101 - in an easy to understand format. And even today sub groups break off sub groups - etc. But the one church from the beginning since and from Christ - was the Catholic Church. It took many years of research for me to get all the nitty gritty details. Boring details - interesting ones too. I know the heresies since the beginning. But for those not inclined to be so studious - i made a simple guide to breaking it down easily. Today is in mass confusion - ppl dont understand why we have so many religions. And who is right -who is wrong. O - forgot a mention of Buddha - how silly. Buddha was born around 600 BC - he was pagan [as all were outside of the Jews] - but he followed the ritual of a pauper he met who fasted and meditated. So he meditated and fasted like the man and gained insight and wisdom. BUT remembering - God didnt abandon the pagans fully. The more one practiced self denial - the more wisdom they obtained. Buddha himself wasnt creating a religion - but because he came up with some profound understandings thru such practices - of self denial - he had many followers when he died. Which caused him to become like a god. Not forgetting it was substantially pagan - so thats no surprise that someone with wisdom would be god like to them His stance on heaven - isnt sure. But it spiraled as things do - to teach nirvana where we reincarnate many times...til we reach heaven. Perhaps - in some faulted way - this was a concept really about purgatory and the levels of purgatory to become misunderstood to mean we come back to earth and reach different levels til we make it to heaven. As i said - the game telephone. Now - im keeping this for in case i need to copy and paste it at any time so i dont have to rewrite it again,.IF ever its needed.
Posted on: Wed, 21 Jan 2015 14:27:36 +0000
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