Thank you all for the moral support. Allow me to complete the story. I heard about the court judgement through a local tabloid newspaper when a friend called me early evening and said "Tendayi urikuziva here kuti uri nu news paper?" I sad NO, but what have I done this time? and she said to me if I were you I would look for the paper and see the story, zvirikunzi watorerwa imba yako and it is a court judgement. I immediately telephoned my lawyer who propheced ignorance as he had gone to the High Court two days earleir to check on the matter and was told the judgement was not yet out. We had waited for close tho three months for the judgement. That same evening, I telephoned my church pastors and informed them about the bad news that I had fianlly lost the house. They came to the house immediately as they thought I might harm myself. I received them with a big smile on my face and said to them "Thank you for preparing me for this day. "I will not cry for there is nothing worthy to cry for instead I will now move on with my life for God cannot give me more than I can bear" We prayed in tounges for close to half and hour and they left. There was a group of women sympathizers who accompanied me to the court during the hearings. Some would sob in court as the whole matter was so touchy. During the trial, I was stressed, I became so thin as I had lost a lot of weight and my hair fell off. I remember that sometimes I would wear my clothes inside out and board a combi to the city wearing ma SANDAK. I would only realize that I was not properly dressed waliking in First Street. At night I experienced night mares and I was ever tired. To make matters worse the trial happended during the times when many had to spend long ques to get basic commoditieis such as bread and maize meal which were scarcey. So many a times I had no food to put on the table and I remember my little girl losing so much weight due to starvation. Some people do not know that poverty affects people at different levels even if you live in the low density surburbs. I experienced poverty at its best the only difference was I had a roof under my head at the time. I also wish to thank a few friends who would chip in with food items and groceries once in a while. The next moring around 5:am the group of women who supported me during the trial came to the house. One of them kept phonning me throughout the night to keep me company as they feared I might commit suicide. I welcomed them with a smile and there were shocked at my calmness. However, they all sobbed and cried in loud voices and the neighbours thought there was a funeral. So I told my friends not to cry as I bleived that there was always a reason for certain things that happen in a person`s life and materials things was not everything. I told them that I would never commit sucide because of a man or a house as no man was worthy my tears. I wanted to see my children and grandchildren grow up and to give them all the support they needed as their mother. These are the women who supported me through my odearl and many ordinary women cannot stand what I went through. It was mental toruture, I fought a system, gender based violence and everything that comes by because I am a woman who is not supposed to have a voice. I am an outspoken person and some had labelled me deviant because I spoke about issues that many whould not dare to talk about publicly. That same weekend my children came to fetch me and I left the house with the few belongings that I now had. Up to this day I never looked back. Later I learnt that the lawyers for the other party were actually called and invited to hear the passing of the judgement but my lawyer was not invited and we all learnt about it through the media. When I went to the High Court they almost refused to give me the full judgement and they asked to pay something like USD30 to get the judgment. I finally got it when my lawyer intervened. I loged a complain on why my matter had to be taken to the media before I was informed but this fell no deaf ears. I learnt a lot about the whole issue of marriages and divorce. Before I was not an empwoereed woman as I knew nothing about the laws of marriage or divorce, no-one had ever given me this kind of information. This experience taught me a lot of things. The other thing that happened during that time is I became a born again christian and this helped me to understand things from a spirtitual perspective and the women who supported me during the trying times were all christians and I do not think I could have gone through this ordeal without this kind of critical support. My focus is now where I am going and like some of you have alluded you cannot change history but you can embrase new things and develop a poisitive attitude for life. God is a miracle working God and its never too late for anything. I will mary again a tthe right time to a right partner. I learnt that you don`t just marry anyone but wives and husbands come from God and one has to ask for guidance when it comes to such matters. I also learnt that he is a God who resotores, he is the same God who restored Job in the bible and he can do the same for me. End of Story.
Posted on: Mon, 02 Sep 2013 08:18:13 +0000
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