The Causes of WWI Baldrick: The thing is: The way I see it, these days theres a war on, right? and, ages ago, there wasnt a war on, right? So, there must have been a moment when there not being a war on went away, right? and there being a war on came along. So, what I want to know is: How did we get from the one case of affairs to the other case of affairs? Edmund: Do you mean Why did the war start? Baldrick: Yeah. George: The war started because of the vile Hun and his villainous empire-building. Edmund: George, the British Empire at present covers a quarter of the globe, while the German Empire consists of a small sausage factory in Tanganyika. I hardly think that we can be entirely absolved of blame on the imperialistic front. George: Oh, no, sir, absolutely not. [aside, to Baldick] Mad as a bicycle! Baldrick: I heard that it started when a bloke called Archie Duke shot an ostrich cause he was hungry. Edmund: I think you mean it started when the Archduke of Austro-Hungary got shot. Baldrick: Nah, there was definitely an ostrich involved, sir. Edmund: Well, possibly. But the real reason for the whole thing was that it was too much effort not to have a war. George: By Golly, this is interesting; I always loved history... Edmund: You see, Baldrick, in order to prevent war in Europe, two superblocs developed: us, the French and the Russians on one side, and the Germans and Austro-Hungary on the other. The idea was to have two vast opposing armies, each acting as the others deterrent. That way there could never be a war. Baldrick: But this is a sort of a war, isnt it, sir? Edmund: Yes, thats right. You see, there was a tiny flaw in the plan. George: What was that, sir? Edmund: It was bollocks. Baldrick: So the poor old ostrich died for nothing.
Posted on: Mon, 04 Aug 2014 13:31:14 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015