The Four Pillars of Good Etiquette Shaykhul Islaam Ibnul Qayyim Good Manners are based on four pillars, it cannot be imagined that the foundation of good manners can be established without them: 1. Patience 2. Virtue 3. Courage 4. Justness Patience will enable one to suppress anger, prevent oneself from causing harm, to be tolerant, forbearing and lenient. It also prevents one from being imprudent and hasty. Virtue enables one to avoid anything lowly and vile, whether related to speech or actions. It enables one to acquire shyness which is the head of all goodness. It prevents one from practicing evil sins, being miserly, lying, backbiting and tale carrying. Courage enables one to have dignity and maintain a high standard of etiquette and character. It enables one to contribute and donate, which stems from the courage of the soul and its strength, as it allows one to give up and depart with what is treasured. It allows one to suppress anger and be forbearing, because it is through ones strength and courage that he suppresses himself from causing problems and reins himself in against engaging in any verbal or physical abuse as it was said; "The strong one is not the one who defeats others physically, rather the strong one is one who is able to control himself when angered!" And this is the very essence of courage, and it is a characteristic with which one can subdue opponents. Justness enables one to be fair in his mannerisms and in taking the middle of the two paths of excessiveness and negligence. It encourages one to be generous and giving - which is the middle path between being subjugated and being miserly. It encourages one to have courage - which is the middle path between being cowardly and having audacity. It enables one to be forbearing – which is the middle path between getting angry and being humiliated or degraded. The basis of all virtuous manners are these four. [Madaarih as-Salikeen: 2/308]
Posted on: Sat, 24 Aug 2013 02:17:22 +0000
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