The Grass Ain’t Greener At the close of what I consider the fourth worst year of my life, I - like so many others - find myself reflecting and looking ahead. Lest you think I am a cynic, rest assured that though I have experienced the most emotional and physical suffering of my life these last several years, I have also experienced some of the most profound moments with my husband and both my children and been overwhelmed and humbled by the love and support of this community and this prayer team. Chase used to rag me in the hospital wanting to know how long I was going to keep up this posting. I would always reply, I guess when I run out of things to say. What he did not know is that what I witnessed in his character during the storm of his young life leaves me not only in awe but filled with the deepest sense of pride. Even in his physical absence, he continues to shape me as a mother, as a person, and as a writer. So as the close of 2014 approaches, I reflect on the times I’ve set myself up for failure by making New Year’s resolutions. I suppose if mankind was capable of keeping resolutions, there would be no need for gym memberships, self-help books, and finance departments because we would all be svelte, in charge of our demons, and debt-free! The simple truth is that I have spent most of my life waiting for my happiness to arrive that I have missed countless opportunities for contentment. The old cliché that the grass is greener on the other side is more than likely posted in the depths of Hell. The devil, who the Bible describes as a prowling lion looking for someone to devour, would have us postpone our happiness until we arrive or overcome that obstacle that impedes contentment. For some, that may be when you graduate from high school, when you get that promotion, when your baby sleeps all night, when you retire, when your finances are straight, when your child gets well, when you get over the death of your child, when you beat this disease, and the list goes on and on and on. The irony is, of course, if you are able to get to that proverbial land of greener grass, it begins to grow out of control, leaving you looking again. My pastor once told me that the pain that I feel over the death of my son is a constant reminder that I was not made for this world. When I take that sentiment to heart, I find enormous comfort. God’s plan did NOT include pain, suffering, and death. The fall of mankind introduced more than thorns, thistles, and increased labor pains; it introduced guilt, shame, malice, annoyance, frustration, burden, and discontent. The road to happiness and contentment is not to be found in greener grass; it is to be found in the muck and mire of our daily lives. So, if I were going to make a resolution for 2015, it would be this: I WILL be satisfied with the grass under my feet with the help of my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Philippians 4:11-13 I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength.
Posted on: Fri, 26 Dec 2014 21:44:07 +0000