The Journal of Genna Oryn February 8th Imperial Year 793 I woke this morning to the sharpest pain in my chest. He was gone. I had no intention of leaving my room today. None. I wanted nothing more then to wallow in my sorrow and lament he fact that he was gone. And he didn’t even warm me he was going! My plan didn’t work though, as Father decided we were to lunch together. It has been over a month, and now, of all days he decides to speak with me? I was scared, to say the least. I thought for sure he had learned about Ferron and that he was planning to stop everything. That he would lock me in my room as if I was a damsel in distress. Granted, that is both horribly romantic as then a prince, or in my case a sailor, would have to save me. But also totally unreasonable. Father would just forbid me leaving, and fire any staff who helped me. It wouldn’t stop me though, I don’t think. But do you know what he wanted? He wasted to apologize. He said he was sorry for everything he had put me through, he was sorry he didn’t talk it over with us before sending Lydia away, and that he was sorry that he was falling apart. He said that the doctor said the mother is not going to get better this time, so I should try and spend as much time as I can with her, that he will no longer restrict my access to her room. My friend, he said Mother will never be well again. Today I though, could not get worse, but it did. It got much much worse. He said that he had seen me riding off yesterday, and he wanted to know where it was I was running to. I told him to the shore, as the sound of the waves and the fresh air cleared my head and I always felt better, even with everything that has happened. He said I was not allowed to go riding alone again. That he forbid it. That if I wanted to leave the main house I needed to go in the carriage with Edgar. That he didn’t want to risk me becoming ill or getting hurt. He said that there were some horrible people in the village and that he needed to know I was safe. That if I couldn’t behave like the young lady I am he will have to assign me a personal servant, one who never leaves my side. He said they would even turn the empty room that connected mine and Lydia’s into a living space so I was never unsupervised. I told him that I understood, and tried to change the subject by asking if I could have a painting set that I could carry with me. Something small and contained. I failed. He went on to say that he was having some business associates in from the Emperial city tomorrow. That I was to be at dinner and dressed to impress, as their youngest son would be with them, and he was the perfect age to court me! My friend, I feel sick! I can’t even go to town to see Ferron when he does come home.
Posted on: Sun, 19 Oct 2014 02:00:00 +0000
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