The Life of Patrick, Part IX: So this morning I went to Rivergate to meet up with our veterinarian for research (which, for what its worth, was really futile cause by the time I got there, I was so late that the whole thing was over.) But that didnt stop my messed up intestines from acting up... hence, I went to the nearest restroom to respond to Natures call and lo and behold a single mens room!!! I tried to open the door but it was occupied. Wonderful. So I waited for what seemed like three lifetimes and still no sign of the mens restroom door budging an inch. And then, by some miraculous twist of fate... from across the hall... a lady went out of the ladies room. I was in a real pickle, should I have stood ground? Or should I have gone down that rabbit hole? I stood there musing to myself and stared at the womens restroom... and stared... and stared... and stared... and then I resolved upon a decision - Okay, before I proceed - in my defense... in my defense, I had two glasses of milk a few hours prior, had really bad diarrhea and I sure as hell wasnt too keen on being the guy who crapped his shorts in Mango. Hellz no!!! So I did what I had to do and stormed into the womens restroom - not by choice but by circumstance - and no!!! There wasnt a swarm of angry, hysteric women screaming their throats out as you imagined. Perfect... everything was going surprisingly well so far, so I went about and did my blissful business in one of the cubicles, wiped my ass, flushed and was on my way out and just my luck, the dude from the adjacent mens restroom finished and went out at EXACTLY THE SAME TIME!!! And I swear we had the longest, most awkward stare-down that even Clint Eastwood would kill for... Dude:... Me:... Dude:... Me:... Dude:... Me:... *nonchalantly* So... ummm, nice weather today huh? Dude: *smiles sheepishly* Uh huh... *slowly walks away indifferent-like* That went well. ehehehehe
Posted on: Sat, 16 Aug 2014 10:08:30 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015