The Real Feel - Stage WTF Before I get my results from yesterday, I wanted to send this out. Scanxiety...it ought to be treated like a traumatic stress syndrome. It makes me sick to my belly. Waiting makes me crazy...even just 24 hours of it. I met with my Pallative Care doc late yesterday afternoon. Shes amazing. Shes someone I cant talk about chronic illness and death - all while laughing and crackin funnies. But, she brought up a great point that Ive thought about many times: Terminal patients and longer than expected life was the hot topic. Ive lived much longer than any of us would have guessed. This type of situation can give us false hope. When the time comes and cancer does what it does, we can become full of depression or anger because the shock of actually dying and facing the beast was so long ago. This can happen to friends/family/supporters as well. This is the false hope that I steer clear of. Its important to know the truth, live every day, listen and communicate. It could be that, until your in a position such as this, its tough to understand the balance and complications of living while youre dying. Riding the waves when you know the destination. Happily ... realistically ... One step at a time. I know my girls and I remain on solid ground - well aware that it is still reality and weve had a great run of it. Well continue to do so too. The man injecting me with the radioactive solution (second pic) ... just before entering this room we saw a very sick young boy in a lot of pain headed for surgery (brain/head). We talked about how we should know how fortunate we really are. I felt so sad for that boy - and I couldnt imagine the pain his mother must go through. Interesting what your mind is capable of - even as a terminal cancer patient. Id take my lumps any day over watching one of my babies suffer...any day. The first pic is the bone scan...last pic is the vein viewer (Christie). Im running late - gotta go. But, whatever I hear today, Ill take the next step...gladly. More later. Love & hugs, C P.S. everything is always done on my right. My left side is compromised from surgeries and not usable. Thats why all the selfies look alike...lol
Posted on: Fri, 21 Nov 2014 17:59:07 +0000
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