The U.S. government has just passed a new law called: The affordable Jeep JK act declaring that every citizen MUST purchase a new Jeep JK, by April 2014. These affordable JKs will cost an average of $54,000-$155,000 each. This does not include taxes, towing fees, licensing and registration fees, fuel and storage fees, maintenance or repair costs. This law has been passed, because until now, typically only wealthy and financially responsible people have been able to purchase JKs. This new law ensures that every American can now have an affordable Jeep JK of their own, because everyone is entitled to a new JK. If you purchase your JK before the end of the year, you will receive 4 free 5 point harnesses; not including monthly usage fees. In order to make sure everyone purchases an affordable Jeep JK, the costs of owning a JK will increase on average of 250-400% per year. This way, wealthy people will pay more for something that other people dont want or cant afford to maintain. But to be fair, people who cant afford to maintain their Jeep JK will be regularly fined and children (under the age of 26) can use their parents Jeep JK to party with until they turn 27; then must purchase their own Jeep. If you already have a JK, you can keep yours (just kidding; no you cant). If you dont want or dont need a JK, you are required to buy one anyhow. If you refuse to buy one or can’t afford one, you will be regularly fined $800 until you purchase one or face imprisonment. Failure to use your Jeep JK will also result in fines. People living in cities, ghettos; inner cities or areas with no access to dirt trails are not exempt. Age, motion sickness, experience, knowledge nor lack of desire are acceptable excuses for not using your Jeep JK. A government review board (that doesnt know the difference between a beadlock and a locker will decide everything, including; when, where, how often and for what purposes you can use your Jeep JK along with how many people can in your JK and determine if one is too old or healthy enough to be able to use their Jeep JK. They will also decide if your JK has out lived its usefulness or if you must purchase specific accessories,(like a $1600 MyGig) or a newer and more expensive Jeep JK. Those that can afford Dana 60’s will be required to do so...its only fair. The government will also decide the name for each Jeep JK. Failure to comply with these rules will result in fines and possible imprisonment. Government officials are exempt from this new law. If they want a Jeep JK, they and their families can obtain Jeep JKs for free, at the expense of tax payers. Unions, bankers and mega companies with large political affiliations ($$$) are also exempt. If the government can force you to buy health care, they can force you to buy a Jeep JK (though I don’t understand why you wouldn’t)....or ANYTHING else.. Yea...its that stupid...
Posted on: Wed, 13 Nov 2013 18:18:47 +0000
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