The continuous onslaught of adversities struck harsh the years Fred and I moved out west for his career in geology. I was a poor little minnow raised in a small family pond that had to learn to swim like a huge bass in a large, crowded city of Tulsa, OK at age 21. I cried for months each time I would hear my familys voices on the telephone. Until then I had only really traveled to NC & GA. There was our honeymoon at Disney in Orlando, a quick trip w the USC geological department to Toronto, Canada; stopped at Niagara Falls (a cousin) on the drive home. Then another geology gathering in San Diego, CA before we moved to Tulsa in July, 1980. Celebrated our first wedding anniversary there. I worked at the same place as Fred ~ Cities Services or Citgo. We started building our new home and I got pregnant immediately against odds the medical profession said would not be easy. We learned all about Tornado Alley. Our house was completed and we were moving in the Friday before Memorial weekend. So full of excitement and life. Sadly I went into labor that very Thursday hours prior to getting the keys, and our firstborn, a perfect little boy died hours after his emergency c section the eve of possession, three months premature. Leaving the hospital to our new home meant an odd procession of incoming cards and floral deliveries to congratulate our first home, yet also came the sympathy cards and arrangements with them as word of loss made the rounds. Mom Falls and Freds brother Greer arrived after Taylor blossomed his gossamer wings, leaving us one tiny perfect footprint to cherish. May 21 will mark thirty-three years since that roller coaster first took off without our consent to ride. They. had driven a huge Dodge Aspen station wagon laden down heavily w brightly wrapped gifts by the dozens, cards, balloons, and a cradle made by Dad Falls. We had to wait three weeks to travel here to Chapin to bury Taylor in the cemetery of the church I always belonged to. Baptized, confirmed, married, and our firstborn in a grave. There were no explanations why. 2 Corinthians chapter one, beginning at verse three reads: Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort; who comforteth us in all our affliction, that we may be able to comfort them that are in any affliction, through the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God. For as the sufferings of Christ abound unto us, even so our comfort also aboundeth through Christ. But whether we are afflicted, it is for your comfort and salvation; or whether we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which worketh in the patient enduring of the same sufferings which we also suffer: and our hope for you is stedfast; knowing that, as ye are partakers of the sufferings, so also are ye of the comfort. (2 Corinthians 1:3-7 ASV) My consolation was knowing Taylor was an angel in Heaven dancing between moonbeams and stars. I knew God understood my pain because He lost Jesus to death. The firstborn; the only son. My firstborn, our only son. That initial takeoff on the Adversity roller coaster was without our consent. How could we fathom the coming ups and downs and horrible curves that waited? I clung to belief in a purpose of God. I did not understand, but I trusted. The five years that followed were filled with even more adversities and continuos roller coaster rides to hell and back, hundreds times over. Taylor was preparation for what would happen soon after. Hope and joy, displacement, hope and hell. Suicidal overload. Part of the purpose has been to give appropriate comfort to others who have suffered similar losses and adversities. I will never truly be free of the haunting memories and sorrows, yet I do know I have been given a unique gift of empathy that has been shared while others have similarly suffered. To GOD be the glory for the good things that came from sorrowful beginnings. Praise God for teaching me how it felt to sacrifice. Praise God for using my adversities to comfort those many who have traveled the same path. Until the day comes we reunite, Annette Monts Falls
Posted on: Mon, 17 Mar 2014 02:41:24 +0000
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